As the show fades in, we see Mentalo, in a polo shirt, chinos, wearing his mask coming into the building from the parking lot. He enters through the rear door, waving to some fans outside. As he enters the backstage area he nods to the cameraman and stops. Sitting in the middle of the floor are two large cages. Inside, snarling and hissing at him are the hellcats. Mentalo gives a little wave…|
Mentalo: Buenos Dias! (He looks at the camera) Little Diablo Kitties! Heh, heh.
Something said from the cage gets beeped out on television and Mentalo shakes his head and walks on. From off screen Mr. Lucifer steps up, watches him leave, looks to the cameraman, smiles, and as he turns, "accidentally" brushes his hand against the restraining bar that keeps the cages locked. The hissing stops and the door slowly swings open....we go to the Monday Night Meltdown opening pyro!
Scooter Sparks: Good evening fans! Welcome to the maiden broadcast of the OCW’s flagship television program, Monday Night Meltdown! Tonight we've got tons of action, and to accomodate it all we're going a full THREE HOURS to make sure we get it all in! But first, I’m joined by a man you all love to hate! The man of the hour! The man who put the “puh” in Pain! Corporal Punishment!
Corporal Punishement: Hows it going Sparks? I see your mama got you dressed and out the door tonight.
Sparks: Heh, sure did Corporal! Are you ready for some excitement tonight?
CP: I’m ready for excitement EVERY night Sparks! Ask your Mama! Hey, see if she wouldn’t mind sending my Viagra back with you at next weeks show.
Sparks: Ouch! The Corporal pulls no punches! You know CP, we saw a lot of action at last weeks Pay Per View, Dawn of Champions. The tag team The OG took home the tag titles while Crippler Bret Steele managed to weasel his way out of the battle royal with the OCW World heavyweight belt.
CP: Weasel? Looked like sound strategy to me Sparks.
Sparks: That’s debatable.
CP: Not from where I sit. He has the gold, and in this business, that’s all that matters. Just because some tall blonde pretty boy decided to start celebrating early and got tossed over the top rope like a sack of week old fudge doesn’t diminish Steele’s win in the slightest!
Sparks: And speaking of Gladiator, he’ll be competing tonight in the first ever TV Title Tournament for the OCW TV Championship! The last twelve grapplers to be eliminated in the DOC battle royal are going head to head for the Tv title.
( The TV Title Tournament bracket can be found HERE)
CP: Should be good Sparks! We got the Horsemen in there, Silver Dragon, my personal fave, Smashin’ Taz and the wild Razor Girl! You know Sparks, she’s kinda sexy…in a kinky sorta way.
(Sparks stops and stares at CP)
CP: I’m just sayin’.
Sparks: And this booth is feeling smaller in a nasty sort of way! In addition, the crowd favorite Mentalo will be in action, along with Edward Rochester, fan favorite Primetime Landon Murphy and Sergei Khruschev and tonight, we'll hear from your NEW OCW World Champion, Crippler Bret Steele!!! But right now, we have a post-interview from the Dawn of Champions, courtesy of the Horsemen 2k7. Cp, you spoke to them after the finals, how were they?
CP: They were robbed Sparks. Did you see what those Bluebloods pulled? The OG wouldn’t have those belt around their waists if those nosy Brits had just minded their own business!
Sparks: Obviously you aren’t the only one who feels that way CP. Let’s go to the footage!
Corporal Punishment and a OCW camerman go into the Horsemen’s locker room. Olsen is pacing the floor infuriated, Sully is tending to JD, and Dic is tending to Ax, who appears to be worse for wear. JD Dixon sees the camera crew and pulls himself up, grabs the mic from the Corporal, and still a bit groggy, launches into his rant.
JD Dixon: “This is an injustice! a Damn injustice! Those belts should be ours, OG enjoy them and keep them warm because we will have what is ours. Bluebloods, you yellow........
JD gets rubber-legged and has to sit back down with the aid of Sully. Olsen grabs the microphone.
Olsen Alexander: “ ROCHESTER! You don't realize what you have done Boy! You stole something from us, and that makes you a COMMON YELLOW THIEF! And what do you do to a thief? You bring him to justice. Its time for some "Horsemen Justice" Because if you jump on one of us, you jump on all of us, so grow eyes in the back of your head, grow eyes in the side of your head, Hell! Buy yourself a seeing eye dog. Because you don't know when, or where, we will come for you! But its coming. and OG, you don't look a gift horse in the mouth, but you look at yours because it won't have any teeth, after we knock em’ down it’s damn throat!
As the camera leaves the locker room, Ax stands.
Ax Alexander: Rochester!!!
Ax does the “cutting” thumb motion across his throat as the door slams.
Sparks: Powerful words there CP!|
CP: You got that damn right Sparks! I wouldn’t want to be either of the Bluebloods tonight!
Sparks: Well, we’ll see how this plays out...right now! Because our first TV Title Tournament match is Ax Alexander and Edward Rochester!
CP: I smell blood Sparks!
Sparks: Indeed! We just got word the Bluebloods arrived, let's go to the back to see the newest additions to the OCW!
Edward Rochester and Phillip Southwell enter the locker room. They pass by Spartan, who is putting some things in his locker and nods to the two arrivals. On a table, near the lockers, is a British flag with a huge black “X” marked through it, along with a small piece of paper lying on top. |
Edward Rochester: “Well this is a fine bloody way to welcome us to the OCW.
Phillip Southwell: “Look, there’s a note.”
Edward R: “It’s says, ‘We’re watching you.” Who’s watching us? (Edward turns in the direction of Spartan) Hey mate, do you know who…
In a flash, from the showers, Ax Alexander appears and jackhammers Rochester through the table. He’s followed by Olsen who joins in and begins stomping Rochester. Dic Blair and Sully Blackburn emerge and buffalo Southwell, ramming his head into a locker and opening a cut above his eye.
But from off screen, Spartan dives into the fray, using his massive golden shield as a weapon and smacking Blackburn across the face, sending him crashing to the ground. He then puts his shoulder behind it, and, using it as a a battering ram, slams into the Alexanders, knocking them off of Rochester. Ax and Olsen hit the ground and scramble away as Blair grabs Blackburn and the Horsemen 2K7 retreat from the dressing room. Spartan tosses his shield aside and kneels, tending to Rochester…
Spartan: We need some help in here!!!!
We cut back to Sparks and the Corporal
Sparks: My word! Those Horsemen have a grudge to be sure! I hope we can get someone down there to attend to the Bluebloods!
CP: Looks like Rochester is going to be a little sluggish for his first round match against Ax tonight.
Sparks: perhaps! But if it wasn’t for the intervention of Spartan, things could have been much worse!
CP: Busybody. He needs to learn to mind his own business. A lesson I’m sure the Horsemen will be more than happy to teach him.
Sparks: Indeed! We...what? I just got word the Horsemen are in back and have grabbed a cameraman...lets go to them live!
In the back ax and Olsen Alexander are standing, out of breath, sweating, and with a microphone.
Olsen: Rochester, I told you that we were coming for you! We left you and your partner laying how you left Ax and JD at the PPV. This was just a warning, don't stick your Brit nose in where it doesn’t belong, especially if its Horsemen business. And Lady Jayne, I wouldn’t get your pretty little self too close either. We might have a surprise for you too. Olsen gives a creepy smile at this and passes the microphone off to Ax
Ax: Shaking his head I thought that you Brits were half way smart… guess not. Rochester don’t you know that if you mess with a bull too long he will gore ya? Especially if that bull is a Horseman! What you did took guts I'll give you that, but that’s all.
What you do to one of us, we come back and do it to you twice over. You want to go to war, that’s fine! Because remember, they send one of yours to the hospital, you send one of theirs to the morgue!
Ax ends the interview with the thumb across the throat as we fade to commerical.
Sparks: “The rivalry between the Horsemen and the Bluebloods just continues to build CP!! We…what’s this?”|
CP: “We got someone in the ring Sparks. A feisty little Mexican firecracker!
Sparks: “Lets go to the ring!”
In the middle of the ring, strutting around is Margharita, and she’s got a microphone.
Margharita: "Baggins, jou little half-man! I challenge jou to a match, mano eh mano! I kick jour ass during the Battle Royal an now I wan do it all myself! I used to have to dance for little men like jou! Jou with jour grubby little gringo fingers. Jou make me sick! Come out Baggins! I kick jour ass all the way back to the Shire!"
Sparks: Baggins finally makes his way to the ring, and he’s looking around like he’s not sure why Margharita has such hate for him. He shrugs and slids into the ring as the bell rings and we have a match!
"I'll kick jour ass all the way back to the Shire! "
"This one is for my Mudda!
Baggins moves quick, and hits Margharita with a body tackle, taking her to the ground! He backs up, plays to the crowd, but Margharita is up! Baggins turns right around and eats a dropkick! Margharita doesn’t waste any time folks, and is on Baggins, straddling him and hammering away with both fists!
The wee lad is in trouble already! Margharita is hammering away like a woman possessed and this wildcat is dragging those studded gauntlets across Baggins head! She stands and has both of Baggins legs spread wide! No! NUT STOMP! She just put those western boots right into Baggins junk and the poor Hobbit is rolling in pain on the mat! The ref is warning Margharita, but she rubs his chest and he back soff.
Baggins just can’t get any momentum folks! Margharita is shaking her rear in his face, and has pulled something out of her chaps…a spur! The ref doesn’t see it and She’s going to town on Baggin’s forehead with a boot spur! He’s busted wide open! There’s blood everywhere! She’s keeping her rear towards the ref and he doesn’t look to be in any rush to change his angle of observation! Baggins is a bloody mess folks! Margharita tosses the spur to the outside and the ref never saw a thing!
Margharita picks Baggins up and lands a snap mare and Savate kick to the back of his head! Oh no! Someone should stop this match folks! Baggins is bleeding like a wee stuck pig! Margharita does a cartwheel and drops a leg on Baggins! She locks in a figure four leglock but the wee lad isn’t giving up! He’s screaming, he’s in pain! But he refuses to say “I quit!”
Margharita doesn’t care about the win folks! She just wants to punish Baggins! She releases the hold and hops to her feet. She lands a pair of kicks to his head, and Baggins, for the firs time in this bout, manages to get to his feet! Margharita hits the ropes and rebounds! She hits a huricanrana! BUT WAIT! Baggins catches her spinning around and lands a DDT!!!!!! Baggins has planted Margharita into the mat like a tiger lily and she’s hit hard! He covers for a quick pin and it looks like he’s got a handful of chaps…and maybe a little bit of Margharita cheek! She’s trying to kick out but his stubby powerful little arms have her tied up…one…two…three! Baggins pulls out a victory!!!!! Margharita is up and scrambling after Baggins who has bailed out of the ring and running to the back! She’s after him and both disappear through the curtains!
Winner: Henry Baggins via pinfall at 9:23
Sparks: What a match! Poor Baggins is going to be feeling this one for a week!
CP: Oh come on Sparks! You think it’s the first time Baggins has had his ass kicked by an angry stripper?
Sparks: That’s not…wait! What’s this? The British Bluebloods are on their way to the ring, but Lady Jayne looks like she’s trying to talk them out of it! Rochester is limping, holding his ribs, and Southwell is being assisted by Lady Jayne! They look pretty busted up...and mad! Rochester is in the ring, and he’s got something to say!
Rochester: Horsemen! You blokes! You think you can get away with what you pulled at Dawn of Champions!?! You think we’re some sort of tea-sipping, crumpet munching light weights!?! Get your sorry tail on down here! We’ll show you how we do things in Jolly old England! With a proper Downing Street beatdown! Right in the center of this ring! Why wait for the tournament? We can go right now!
Southwell: Bloody right! Southwell winces in pain as he speaks Even after what you pulled, we’ll still ‘take you downtown’ as you Americans say!
At the entrance ramp, Dic Blair and Sully Blackburn appear. Blair has a microphone and both are slowly walking towards the ring.
Rochester: What’s this? We want the Alexanders!
Blair : Well pal, what you want and what you get ain’t always the same thing. Tonight, you got us!
Blair throws down the microphone and the Horsemen charge the ring!
Sparks: We have a match! The bell rings and all four men are in the ring. The ref is trying to restore some order here! He finally gets two men in the ring , and Blair and Rochester start out, with the angry Brit tossing the Horseman around the ring!
He lands several forearms, whipping “The Nature Boy” into the ropes and planting a big boot in his face! Flair goes down and quickly tags in Sully! Blackburn comes in jawing, but Rochester hits a dropkick that sends him to the mat. But wait! Blair has the ref’s attention! Blackburn is going to his trunks…and he’s got a pair of brass knucks! He goes to use them on Rochester, but the big Brit blocks the punch, head butts Blackburn and he goes to the ground! Rochester picks the knucks up, he puts them on! But NO! The ref has turned around, thanks to Blair, and sees the knucks and Blackburn on the mat! HE CALLS FOR THE BELL! What a gosh-darn injustice! What a robbery! Rochester is trying to plead his case, but the ref is hearing none of it! The Bluebloods have been disqualified!
Winners: The Horsemen via DQ at 3:41
CP: Not so fast Sparks! The Bluebloods got company!
Sparks: No! The Alexander’s are coming to the ring! They’ve got chairs! Looks like they are coming to finish what they started in the back!
CP: You don’t tussle with the Horsemen Sparks! Another nasty little surprise for the British Bluebloods is that with this loss to the Horsemen Team 2, they loose that coveted #3 OCW Tag Team Title Contender spot and drop straight out of the rankings!!! Uppity brits!
Sparks: That's true CP! But it looks like the Bluebloods are outnumbered! I think they have much bigger problems to deal with...BUT WAIT! Here comes “Primetime” Landon Murphy and Sergei Khrushchev out of the back! They’ve intercepted the Horsemen! All four Horsemen and the Bluebloods, along with Primetime and Khrushchev are trading punches in the aisle! The Horsemen are retreating! They’ve high tailed it out of there! Lady Jayne is in the ring! She’s got a microphone!
Lady Jayne: Is that your best showing Horsemen!?! Perhaps you believe you have strength in numbers! Perhaps you think my team is outmatched! Well, in all of this excitement, we forgot to mention, that we’ve got some “Allies” of our own! Now, YOU mess with one of US, you mess all of US, as you knuckle-dragging Neanderthals are so fond of saying!
Lady Jayne is joined in the ring by the British Bluebloods, Primetime and Khrushchev. Primetime takes the microphone.
Primetime Landon Murphy: That’s right Horsemen! Say hello…to the “ALLIES!”
Sparks: My goodness! Looks like we’ve got a united front CP!
CP: Maybe so Sparks, but The Allies still better watch their rear! Especially Rochester, who’s first round match with Ax Alexander is up next!
We fade to commercial
Sparks: As promised fans, this is the first match of the TV Title Tournament, and what a match to kick us off! I don’t need to build this one up!
Sparks: Ax Alexander has hit the ring folks, and he looks furious! I guess Spartans interference in the Horsemen’s plans and the new formation of the “The Allies” caught him off guard, and things haven’t quite worked out how he would have liked. The British Bluebloods music hits, and Edward Rochester is in the aisle, slowly making his way to the ring. He looks pretty busted up folks, and it’s not like he didn’t just wrestle in a match- albeit brief. Phillip Southwell is nowhere to be found, probably in the back resting up- but Sergei Khrushchev has accompanied Rochester to the ring. GLASNOST!
Ax is jawing at Rochester, who sets his jaw and bolts for the ring! Not sure what Alexander said folks but it looked to have lit a fire under the big Brit! Rochester is in and Ax drops an elbow on him as he enters, leveling him to the mat. Ax picks him up and sends him into the ropes, and locks in a big bearhug! Rochester looks drained…that jackhammer he took through the table earlier really must have done some damage.
Alexander is squeezing for all he’s worth, but Rochester is powering out…and he’s broken the hold! But not before Alexander can get off a forearms smash that knocks Rochester back to the ground. Ax goes for a pin…one…two…Rochester kicks out at two!
Alexander slaps a hammerlock on Rochester, but the big Brit fights back, kicks Ax in the gut and while he’s on the ground, goes to the ropes and hits a knee drop! A pin…one...but Ax kicks out at one. Rochester picks him up and slings him into the corner…Rochester backs up, charges! But Ax moves! He throws the Blueblood right into the ringpost! Oh no! Rochester looks like he really hurt his shoulder. Alexander follows up with a suplex that plants Rochester on that injured arm and Ax is going to work on it!
He’s pounding away, stomping with that big boot. But Rochester tries to mount a comeback! Ax swings, and Rochester hits a DDT! Alexander is planted like a spring daisy! Rochester signals to the crowd and picks up Ax and hits a Superplex! Another cover! One…two…but no! Alexander kicks out at the last second, preserving his chance at the TV Title! Rochester is still favoring that shoulder folks, but he looks like he’s trying to get Ax in a neckbreaker, but the big man hits a closed fist to Rochester who stumbles back…Ax is measuring him….JACKHAMMER! Alexander hits the jackhammer and Rochester is on the mat! The ref is nearby, quick cover…one…two…three!
Alexander has his arm raised and manages to get another kick in to Rochester. But here comes Khrushchev! He slide sin the ring and Alexander wisely bails and high tails it through the crowd to the back as Khrushchev checks on his downed partner.
Winner: Ax Alexander via pinfall in 8:04
Sparks: What a match! Those two surely have a major grudge to settle between them. I refuse to believe this is the end of that feud!|
CP: It’s just the beginning Sparks! I’ve watched Alexander for years, especially when he was wrestling down south, and I can tell you he’s as tough as they come, and he carries a grudge. This is just the beginning. Those Allies better watch their backs!
Sparks: True CP. But I think it could be argued that Rochester would have fared much better if he hadn’t been on the receiving end of that cowardly attack earlier!
CP: Wouldn’t have mattered none Sparks! I hate to burst your bubble of reality, but Alexander would have taken that boy down, pre-match attack or no. He’s just that tough!
Sparks: Well, another tough competitor is his cousin Olsen, who’s next up in the second first round match for that coveted TV Title.
CP: Coveted is right Sparks! That belt is the stepping stone to the OCW World Heavyweight belt that’s around Steele’s waist. The TV Title holder is GUARANTEED a shot at the world title!
Sparks: Indeed they are! And the competition for the TV title looks to be fierce! And speaking of fierce, here comes one fierce competitor to the ring-“Primetime” Landon Murphy! Those two were trading some mean fisticuffs earlier CP..no love lost there!
CP: Darn tootin Scooter! But what’s with Primetime's tights Sparks? I have to wear earplugs just to look at em!
Sparks: Let’s go to the action!
Sparks: We’ve got another brawl coming for you folks. It’s the polished and flashy superstar, Primetime Murphy against the rough and ready brawler, Olsen Alexander. Alexander is already in the ring...and what’s this? His cousin Ax is on the outside! That’s not necessary! Ax already had his match!
Primetime is coming to the ring, and he sees Ax…there seems to be some back and forth, but Murphy enters anyway, and is charged by Olsen! But the youngster knew what was coming and reversed the charge, whipping Olosen into the ropes! Firemans Carry Ram! Olsen hits the mat and immediately goes outside as Primetime stomps his feet! The ref is counting…he gets up to eight as the Horsemen talk strategy and Olsen re-enters the ring. Both stare each other down…then lock up.
Olsen scoops up Murphy and slams him to the mat, but Murphy rolls away and is back on his feet! He hits the ropes and comes off with a clothesline! Alexander goes down! Murphy picks the big man up by his beard, but Alexander was playing possum! He hits Primetime with a short arm clothesline and the young man goes down! Alexander covers but can only score a one count.
Alexander locks in a full nelson and he’s wearing Primetime down. The younger man is fighting back, he’s still got a lot of energy left. Alexander is putting his full weight on Murphy, really trying to get him to submit…but it’s not happening. Murphy throws his head back and busts Alexander in the nose! Olsen is stunned! Murphy is back on him and picks him up-and hits an atomic drop! Both men are still very much alive in this match!
Murphy hits a shoulder block that sends them both outside! Olsen is on the ground and Primetime is going up top! He’s on top of the turnbuckle! He’s going…NO! Ax Alexander just pushed Primetime from the top of the turnbuckle! He’s hit hard on the ground! The ref is counting…Olsen is still down. Ax is over, he’s grabbed his cousin! He’s tossed Olsen back in the ring! Now Ax has Primetime, he’s picked him up…he’s slammed Primetime into the ring apron! Oh, that figures! He’s tossed the stunned Primetime back into the ring, and Olsen is in there…waiting. But here comes Khrushchev and Rochester! They attack Ax on the outside and double team him while inside Olsen e hits “The Wrecking Ball”…a running kneedrop to the chest and Primetime is flat on his back! Come on ref!
Olsen covers for the pin…one…two…three. Those damn Alexanders have done it again!
Winner: Olsen Alexander via pinfall in 12:31
On the outside Olsen jumps in to help his cousin and the Alexanders bail out! This can’t continue to go on all night folks! It’s madness!
Sparks: What a match! We now take you to the high flying Mentalo, who has a match coming up against Razor Girl. He’s in the back, and apparently, has a microphone!|
CP: Did he steal it?
Sparks: No! Of course not!
CP: Hmph. Says you. I’m starting to feel like I’m sitting in the middle of El Caporal! Or having a roof put on…”
Sparks: You’re going to get us kicked off the air! Let’s go to Mentalo!
Mentalo is in the backstage area with a microphone. He’s fiddling with it, trying to get it to work.
Mentalo: Hello? Test? Yes? Is this thing on? Oh...Hello! Hey, this is Mentalo! Most of you OCW fans might not recognize me, so let me refresh your memory!
Mentalo drops to the floor, face down, and continues speaking into the microphone.
Mentalo: See? This is how I looked my first time on the camera, when that nasty, stinking, no-good so-and-so Buck Leeds, Leeds, you, ooh you make me mad! If I see you around here, you just better watch out!
Mentalo gets back up
Mentalo: See, people think I’m some sort of Mexican panties of the waist! Well, I’m tough! In the Total Mexican Wrestling Federation I was champion! And just like, well, like tonight, I’m , that, that Tvv Title is mine! I don’t care if I need to go through Razors Lady, or whoever….
A scream pierces the air and Mentalo looks up, just as a thick heeled combat boot comes from off-camera and catches him in the head, sending him crashing into a nearby dumpster. From off camera both Hellcats appear and start double teaming Mentalo. Barb Wire picks him up while Razor Girl hammers at his head with closed fist punches. Finally, Razor Girl hoists him up onto her shoulder and throws the luchadore like a dart into the side of the dumpster! He’s bleeding, unconscious, his costume is ripped and he looks rough. The Hellcats finish him off by slamming a full trash can over his head and upper body, and, armed with a pair of ball bats, begin hammering the can until it falls over, with Mentalo still inside, his lower body twitching uncontrollably.
Barb Wire smiles and begins licking the blood from the bat as Razor Girl hoists Mentalo up and walks over to a dumpster, depositing him inside. Barb Wire sits on top of the trash can while Razor Girl bares her fangs at the camera and picks up the microphone.
Razor Girl: This is “Razor Lady” saying…RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIP EM'!!!
Razor Girl then drops the microphone and jumps on top of the dumpster lid, hopping up and down, hammering it into Mentalo's back. Mr.Lucifer appears and snaps his fingers and both Hellcats obediently go to his side and kneel, bowing their heads so he can re-attach their chains to their collars.
Sparks:"My stars! Mentalo has just been brutalized! Someone get some help down there!"|
CP: Calm down Scooter, I'm sure Tamale is fine...
Sparks: "That's Mentalo!"
CP: "Whatever. Those Hellcats sure seem well behaved. Did you see how they came when called? Wish my ex-wives were like that."
Sparks: I'm sure Mentalo won't be able to compete tonight folks. That was simply sick."
CP: Then I guess he will forfeit the match. Someone should send him some Sangria or something, make him feel better."
The Hellcats music hits and Mr. Lucifer leads both Hellcats down the aisle to the ring...
"Can someone have an...uh...how you say...ambulance...ready? "
Sparks: “This is a joke CP! They know Mentalo is laid out in the back, stuck in a dumpster, unable to compete!
CP:” Guess so Sparks! But Razor Girl still needs her hand raised to be declared the winner. “
Sparks: “There goes Razor Girl into the ring! Mr. Lucifer is calling for the ref to ring the bell. He does! 1…2…3…4…looks like this one isn’t even going to be a match fol…what’s this!?!? Mentalo is coming to the ring! He’s busted, battered, bleeding, covered in trash but the tough luchadore is limping to the ring!
CP: And he's carrying a trash can full of weapons Sparks! That's real heroic isn't it? Wonder if he has any watermelons in there?
Sparks: Heroic or not, this shows tremendous guts on Mentalo's part! It shows that he simply won't lie down and become a victim!
CP: “Well, he better hurry up! Mr.Lucifer is trying to get the ref to speed up his count! Come on ref, you can count faster than that! He must be from Kentucky Sparks, those double digits must have him stumped!”
Sparks: "Barb Wire is moving to intercept! But Mentalo shows a burst of speed and slides under the bottom rope at the count of nine and he’s in this match!”
Sparks: Mentalo looks like walking hell folks. Razor Girl doesn’t waste any time however, and a flying tackle takes him to the mat, and the weapons fly all across the ring!. She’s straddling him, biting into his mask! He’s writhing around, trying to get free, but its a wasted effort!
Oh no! Razor Girl has something hidden from the view of the ref…it looks like…is that a cheese grater? You can’t be serious…it is! Razor Girl just picked a cheese grater from the trash strewn about the ring and is concealing it from the ref. Come on ref! Get that stuff out of the ring! How can you have a match with all of that…Barb wire is up on the ring apron distracting the ref and Razor Girl is going to work on Mentalos face! Oh my stars!!!!! His mask is in shreds folks! But it’s not like you can make out what his face looks like…CRIMSON MASK! His face is pulp!!!! What the hell is wrong with these Hellcats!?!
Looks like Mr. Lucifer is pointing out Mentalo is loosing a lot of blood…and of course the cheese grater has been tossed from the ring. This is terrible folks…poor Mentalo is hemorrhaging blood from his face like a water hose. The ref checks on him…and calls the match!
What a sad commentary on this valiant warriors effort folks! He came out to try to compete, even after the severe beating he took at the hands of those Hellcats earlier, just to be brutalized to the point where even his mama wouldn’t recognize him! He’s crawling around on all fours, he can’t see…lets get some help out here for him! Oh no! Both Hellcats are in the ring…and Razor Girl is pulling Mentalo up, holding him…and Barb Wire is grinding those five inch stiletto boot heels right into his forehead!
But wait! Someone has come from the locker room! It’s Henry “The Hobbit” Baggins! He’s hit the ring and tackled Mentalo from the Hellcats grip! He’s pulling the luchadore through the ropes and has tossed him over his shoulder! The Hobbit Baggins is scurrying back to the locker room with Mentalo over his shoulder! The Hellcats are hissing and screaming, but Mr. Lucifer is keeping them in check!
My word, that was horrific! Poor Mentalo! One has to wonder if he will be forced to wear a mask so people don’t puke when they see his scarred face from now on! Thank Goodness for Hobbit Baggins! That wee little fellow probably saved Mentalos life…oh how disgusting! The Hellcats are taking turns licking Mentalo’s blood off of Barb wires spiked heel! That’s sick! I can’t believe Razor Girl actually advanced in this tournament!
Winner: Razor Girl via Ref Decision in 4:20
Sparks: “Amazing! Well folks, as you know, the tag team Toxic Shock suffered a brutal assault by the Hellcats this past week at Dawn Of Champions. A beating I haven’t seen the likes of since…well..earlier tonight I guess. I had a chance to catch up with them at the local rehab center where they are spending the week.”|
We see Scooter Sparks walking the hallways. The cameraman follows him as he looks at a room number and knocks, then goes in.
Sparks: Hello? Toxic Shock?
Unidentified Voice: No! Hemorrhoids !
Sparks: “Oh! I’m sorry I was looking for…”
From across the hall a voice calls out
Creeper: Sparks, you idiot! Over here!
Scooter turns to see Creeper coming towards him, pushing Crypt along in a wheelchair. Both are in hospital gowns, still wearing their masks.
Sparks: “Oh my! I had no idea it was this bad!”
Creeper: “It’s not. Crypt just likes to take rides.”
Sparks: “Ah, I see. Well, you two are at least breathing and not covered in blood, which is how we saw you last time….”
Creeper: “Yeah, those damn Hellcats did a number on us! You better believe…”
As Creeper is ranting a nurse approaches, waving her hands…
Nurse: “You need to hold it down sir! You are too loud!
Creeper pulls a butcher knife from under his gown and puts it in the nurses face
Creeper: “Shut your hole and get back to your station before I see how much of your fat tail I can cutup and fit in a bedpan.
Creeper: “And bring my partner some Jello while you’re at it.”
The nurse scurries off in a panic
Sparks: “Uhm, I better go before security shows up. Any word when you two will return? Anything to add?”
Creeper grabs the mic
Creeper: “Yeah Sparks. When we get out of here, we’re coming back, and we’re coming back to inflict pain and to deal with those Hellcats. You and the rest of the OCW just better get ready…”
The shot fades to black as Sparks scurries away…
Sparks: Wow! We’ve seen a ton of action tonight folks, and we’re just getting started! Up now, we’ve got Smashin’ taz heading to the ring with his manager, Salvatore Savage. You know CP, Savage also manages The Awesome Ones. Seems like an odd fit, don’t you think?
Cp: I’ve seen stranger things Sparks! Look, see this scar on my upper thigh?
Sparks! Gah! No! No I didn’t! And no I don’t need to!
CP: Your loss. Seems you didn’t inherit a strong stomach from your mama! Still, Savage is sharp Sparks, sharp as they come. If he’s got those yancy little pretty boys the Awesome Ones in his stable, it’s for a damn good reason!
Sparks: May be, CP! Two powerhouses here folks, one a massive Russian powerlifter, the other a short, Australian spark plug! Smashin Taz is accompanied by his manager, Salvatore Savage. Both wrestlers enter the ring and the bell rings and the match is on! Taz starts with and arm drag that sends Sergei across the ring. The big Russian laughs it off but Taz is on him, hammering away with an double axe handle. Still the big Russian takes it, and turns around, delivering a massive elbow smash that drops Taz to the mat.
Sergei picks Taz back up and sends him into the ropes…Taz ducks a clothesline and rebounds, hitting a flying body press! Sergei goes down! Taz is on him like a wild dog, and begins gnawing at Sergeis forehead! The Russian manages to get him off, and sends Taz into the turnbuckle. He’s right behind him, nad slams his head hard into the turnbuckle!
He pulls him off and Irish whips him into the opposite turnbuckle! He’s putting his head into it again! He smashes taz’s head …five…six…seven…ten times! Ten times his head goes into the turnbuckle! Taz is out on his feet folks! He hits the mat and Sergei covers…and only gets a two count! Taz, practically out of it, rolls to the outside to buy some time, climbing back onto the apron at the six count. Sergei comes over to “help” Taz back in the ring, but the crafty Australian grab Sergei by the head and drops back to the arena floor! He’s snapped the big Russians neck across the top rope and Sergei is down in the ring!
Tax immediately gets back in the ring and sets up the dazed Russian for a DDT…and hits it! Sergei is in trouble folks…Taz covers …one…two…but no! He kicks out at the last second. Taz has scrambled behind him and has locked on a sleeper! They are in the middle of the ring! Sergei can’t reach the ropes! Taz works his massive forearms beneath the Russians throat and Sergei is going out! It’s nap time for the big Russian! But wait! He’s fighting back! He up to one knee! He’s standing! But Taz is hanging on like a rabid little pit bull! He’s not letting go! Sergei charges backwards, looks like he’s going to crush Taz against the turnbuckle...no! The sharp ring vet drops as Sergei makes contact with the turnbuckle, doing far more damage to himself!
Now Taz hhas tripped up the big Russian, and he’s locked in a figure four…no! It’s the Australian bow tie! His signature move! He’s inverted the figure four and has reached back and just barely managed to wrap his fingers around Sergei’s face. They are in the middle of the ring…but Sergei won’t tap! Taz is applying pressure for all he’s worth! The ref is checking Sergei…his hand goes up and falls once…twice…it’s up….and he’s tapped! Sergei, the big Russian has submitted to the Australian bowtie! What a match folks! Neither man left anything in that ring! They put it ALL on the line! What a match!
Winner: Smashin’ Taz via submission at 16:02
Sparks: As stated before fans, the OCW battle royal for the world title certainly sparked some conflicts, as you’ve seen play out tonight in that gruesome Margharita-Baggins match. In addition, it saw two rulebreakers, the ever-arrogant King Cut and the big bounty hunter from Pennsylvania, Head Hunter, end a short lived alliance that saw both men eliminated at the same time.|
CP: Two big dogs in the same ring don’t last Sparks! Those two were threats, and looks like they burned each other out of the match!
Sparks: Too true Cp! Well, never let it be said that Head Hunter doesn’t like to get his revenge on! He’s in the back with a microphone!
CP: Folks got a lot of talking going on tonight! I like to see me some action! Deeds not words!
Sparks: I’m sure we’ll have plenty of that CP! Thank goodness it’s a three hour show! Let’s go to Head Hunter!
In the locker room, Headhunter is in his ring attire and a denim biker style jacket, and a ball bat over his right shoulder.|
Head Hunter: “Now listen here. At Dawn of Champions a certain person screwed me out of my shot at both the OCW World AND TV Title! Now, most people would sit here and whine to you fans for a good 10-15 minutes and cry like little babies without their blankies.
He switches the shoulder the bat is resting on)
I ain’t gonna pull that bull round here, my word is going to be simple: King Cut, meet me in the ring in 30 minutes, or I’ll gladly introduce you to my friend here.
(as Head Hunter finishes is sentence he smacks the floor with the bat as if he were mining, indicating the possible beating waiting for King Cut.)
Head Hunter: Your Head Is Mine.
Sparks: We’re up to match # 5 in this wild TV Title Tounrey folks. Gladiator is already in the ring, and Ax enters the arena with Olsen in tow…but whats this? David Diamond is in the ring, he’s got two security guards with him…and they’re taking Olsen back! Ax is livid! But Diamond is shaking his head and gesturing for Olsen to go to the back! Ax isn’t liking this one bit folks!
Ax hits the ring, but he’s still mouthing off to Diamond, and has his back to the ring. Gladiator helps him out by flipping him over the top rope and bringing him inside. The ref rings the bell and the match is on!
Early armdrag by Gladiator. But a pair of punches gets Ax out and he bodyslams the blonde beefcake to the mat. Pretty looks are certainly no match for good old fashioned Minnesotan toughness! Alexander hits an elbow smash, picks Gladiator up, puts him into the ropes, Gladiator ducks a clothesline, and hits a flying drop kick! Ax hits the mat! Pinfall! One…two…and kick out! Gladiator whips Ax into the turnbuckle and charges him, hitting the grappler hard!
Ax is out on his feet in the corner- the earlier events must have really taken a toll on this grappler! He’s already been involved in a few brawls and a rough first round match with Rochester. Gladiator is dragging Ax’s head across the ropes! Alexander shows some life and whips Gladiator into the turnbuckle! He hits hard and goes outside, holding shi shoulder! Ax follows, but Salvatore Savage is in the way and smacks Ax with his cane! Alexander grabs Savage and throws him into some nearby chairs! The older manager went down hard folks and he’s covered in soda and popcorn!
Both men reenter the ring and Gladiator charges, hitting Alexander with a clothesline and taking him to the ground. Suplex! Gladiator look to be in control now folks, but wait! Ax reverses, whips Gladiator into the corner, and hits an Avalanche! Gladiator is slumping in the corner and it looks like fortune has turned. Ax has turned around to jaw at the crowd and do his throat cutting motion…but here comes Gladiator! He was faking and hits The Awesomness!!! Ax goes down and Gladiator makes a quick cover! One..Two…THREE! Gladiator advances in the tournament!
Winner: Gladiator via pinfall at 8:36
As we come back from commercial, in the back, JD Dixon is strutting through the hallway, chatting on his cell phone. |
JD Dixon: No, no that’s great news. Yes, tonight, probably at the end of the show…”
He stops to go into the locker room, but Corporal Punishment intercepts him.
CP: JD! Lot’s of action going on tonight! The victory over the Bluebloods, Blackburn has a match with…
JD Dixon: “No interviews my good man! It’s strategy time for the Horsemen 2k7. Suffice to say, at the end of the night, the Horsemen will be riding high!”
With that, JD opens the dressing room door-and is violently jerked inside!!! The door slams and the sounds of an attack can be heard from inside the dressing room!
CP: HEY! HEY What’s going on in there!
Corporal Punishment tries the door but it’s locked. He throws a shoulder against it, but it doesn’t budge.
Cp: OW! There goes my freaking golf swing! Let’s get some security down here!
We fade to commercial...Sully Blackburn is stnading in the interview area. Sully has a microphone.
Sully: I was expecting The Corporal, but he isn’t here. No need, I don’t need a babysitter for my interview and what I have to say is short and sweet. Tobias Jorum, you have the privilege of stepping into the ring with the best wrestler in the sport. You are an up and comer, and your thinking this match will boost you up that ladder. But son, when you come down to that ring, you'll have second thoughts, and be begging Mr. Diamond 'Please sir let me out of the match, because he’s just too DAMN good.' HA! Ha!”
Sully ends the interview and as he does so, Corporal Punishment runs in from off screen, says something the microphone doesn’t pick up and Sully curses and scrambles from the interview set.
"Loball, get ready for the WRECKING Ball!"
Great, just what I wanted. Another match with this fat, sausage-chewing wino.
Sparks: We’re back from commercials fans and I can say it’s already been an action packed night! CP is back with me…CP what the Hades is going on with JD Dixon? What happened?
CP: No idea Sparks! Once we got in there the room was empty! But it looks like something went down. I told Blackburn what was going on but I don’t know if he’s told the other Horsemen yet!
Sparks: Insane! Well, we’ve got a match folks, and can’t be distracted by whatever is happening outside the ring right now!
CP: Got that right Sparks! And lots more to come! This TV Title Tournament isn’t anywhere near being over with! There are still six competitors very much alive, and now we’ve got Olsen Alexander and one half of the tag champs, Loball! He just got back from Compton, California last night where he and his cousin, the other half of the OG, Smooth-T spent the week taking it easy. We’ll have their taped interview later in the program!
Sparks: Sounds good CP! But right now Loball is in the ring, wearing his tag team belt. That has to seriously cheese off Olsen, who, as fans know, lost against the OG in the tag tournament final last week at Dawn of Champions.
CP: Darn tootin’ Sparks. I think Olsen is going to use this match as a way to use Loball as an example. He’s sending a message tonight!
Sparks: Agreed! And he’s in the ring! Olsen, alone, charges Loball and both lock up. The wiry ganagster grabs the ropes however and forces a break! Olsen looks upset! Loball circles, bouncing on his boots and mouthing at Olsen. They lock up again…and Loball is back in the ropes! Another break! Olsen is screaming at the ref, and Loball hits with a forearms smash! Olsen looks stunned and the gangster locks in a full nelson! Alexander is laughing, and powers out, hitting a massive elbow on top of Loball’s head! Loball hits the ground and Olsen covers…one…two…but Loball manages to roll out!
Olsen reaches down and hooks in a leg lock, twisting the young man’s ankle like a pretzel! He’s screaming in pain! Olsen isn’t letting go! He’s liable to break this young man’s ankle! The ref is checking…AND LOBALL GIVES UP! He’s tapped out folks! Olsen celebrates by reaching down and grabbing the tag belt off of the timekeepers table and whipping Loball! He’s going across the young man’s back with that strap! Oh we’re going to get letters folks! A big white man whipping the life out of a wiry, impoverished African American! Have we not seen this enough throughout history…still, Olsen is your winner and tosses the belt on top of the prone Loball as his hand is raised in victory- and he advances in the tournament!
Winner: Olsen Alexander via submission at 6:42
Sparks: Looks like we were able to get Blackburn out here to wrestle folks! He’s arguing with David Diamond, but Diamond is gesturing him to the ring! Blackburn storms the ring, and it’s obvious the Horsemen are distracted by the abduction of Dixon!
Sully starts out by armdragging the young Jorum to the mat and working on that arm. Blackburn is easily the stronger of the two, though Jorum does have a height and youth advantage over Blackburn. A little back and forth as Jorum powers up, and hits a bulldog! Quick pin on Blackburn only gets a one count and Blackburn locks in a chicken wing.
Jorum whips Blackburn to the ropes, misses a clothesline, and Blackburn hits a dropkick! Jorum hits the ground and Blackburn manages to hit another! We know Blackburn is an accomplished mat technician folks but it’s always entertaining to see that he can still fly around the ring with the best of them!
Jorum rolls out of the ring and is trying to get his breath. He’s fine folks and is right back in the ring! He lands a forearms smash! Another! Blackburn is reeling, and as stunned as Jorum was by Blackburn’s agility, Blackburn seems equally put off by Jorums ferocious side! Blackburn is on the mat and Jorum has both feet! Looks like Blackburn won’t be seeing much action after the matches as Jorum hits a headbutt to the groin! Oh! Blackburn isn’t going to like that folks and I think it’s possible he’s underestimated this youngster!
Blackburn is back up and begging off in the corner! The ref backs Jorum up as Blackburn slowly gets to his feet. Both lock up and Blackburn scores a suplex, and hangs on as they hit the mat, cradling Jorum …one…two…just two folks! Blackburn stands and takes the dazed Jorum and hoists him hitting a backroll press! Lots of strength to pull that off folks! Blackburn may not look like a bodybuilder but he’s strong where it counts!
Jorum is on his knees, and catches Blackburn with an elbow to the midsection! Blackburn didn’t expect it and he’s double over! Jorum snaps up to his feet and gets Blackburn in a suplex position, wait! He drops him across the top rope and slingshot suplexes him to the mat! Blackburn is stunned! He’s bounced up and is resting in the corner begging off! But Jorum is on the attack! He rushes in and hits an avalanche! Blackburn is stumbling into the middle of the ring and Jorum goes in for the kill! He tries to scoop Blackburn, but the crafty old vet reverses it! He hits the METROPLEX! Jorum is planted in the center of the ring! Cover by Blackburn! One…two…THREE! Blackburn pulls out a win! Amazing! Jorum is up and stunned! He thought he had this one in the books fan! I have to admit, I thought the youngster was going to walk away a victor tonight folks!
Winner: Sully Blackburn via pinfall at 10:40
Sparks: What a wild night folks! The Thunder God, Thor is in the ring, hefting his massive hammer, Mjolnir. He’s a monster folks, towering over most of ht competitors in the OCW! But as big and as fierce as he looks, I have a feeling that doesn’t mean squat to his next opponent!
And speaking of! Here comes Razor Girl! She snarling and bucking at the end of her leash! Mr. Lucifer is smiling, waving to the crowd and doing that awkward walk of his. He’s reaching down, and he’s released Razor Girl! She’s charged the ring and shoulder blocks Thor into the turnbuckle! She’s a large opponent folks! Tough, muscular, and she’s got an unmatched killer instinct!
What’s this? She’s actually wrapped Thor in a bearhug! She’s managed to get her arms up under his shoulders and she’s squeezing for all he is worth! Thor matches her, and both are squeezing for all they are worth! Looks like the Thunder God is just toying with Razor Girl though, and scoop-slams her to the mat! She’s trying to get back up but he hits a double ax handle and she goes back to the mat.
Thor picks her up and up! He hits a big suplex and Razor Girl seems like she may have met her match! Thor has turned around and is playing to the crowd…but wait! Razor Girl has slowly pulled her leash/chain from the nearby corner and as Mr. Lucifer has distracted the ref, she’s gotten up, that massive chain is wrapped around her hand! Thor turns around…and gets hit!!! Thor just got busted open by that massive chain and the ref never saw it! Razor Girl tosses it back to the outside and leaps on top of the turnbuckle, wagging her tongue at the crowd! She’s wasting valuable time! She spins around and comes off the second turnbuckle with a forearm smash to the prone Thunder God! She covers as the ref turns back around! One...two…No! Thor has kicked out! If Razor Girl had covered sooner this match might already be over!
She’s picking the massive grappler up…and hits a backbreaker! She actually got him up and hit a backbreaker! But it took a lot out of her folks! Thor and Razor Girl are both struggling to get their bearings, she’s on her feet and he’s climbing the ropes! He’s shaking his mane of long golden blood-soaked hair, looks like Thor is getting his second wind!
Razor Girl lets out a scream and charges Thor! But he grabs her and hits a neckbreaker! She’s on the mat! He’s wasting no time folks! He picks her up, she’s upside down, struggling, he can’t get her in position…tries again, wrapping his massive arms around her waist! He’s got her up! Razor Girl is upside down! THOR”S HAMMER! Thor just planted Razor Girl with that devastating sit-down piledriver! Oh my stars! Thor falls over and hooks the leg...One…two…three! He’s beaten the Hellcat to advance!
Winner: Thor via pinfall at 12:51
Sparks: And Mr.Lucifer is in the ring! He must be trying to…wait! He’s hooking the chain back on the prone Razor Girls’ collar. Now he’s DRAGGING her unconscious body to the back like he’s pulling a little red wagon! An evil, post-apocalyptic, voluptuous little red wagon! With a mohawk!
Sparks: What a match! Razor Girl really hung in there CP!|
CP: She faced off against one of the biggest in the OCW Sparks! That took a lot of guts…and I guarantee the Thunder God is going to be feeling this match the rest of the night!
Sparks: Too true! Well fans, as you know the OCW Tag Champs were crowned at Dawn of Champions last week! The OG- “Original Gangsters”, took home the tag belts after making their way through a ten team elimination tournament, eliminating the Horsemen- the team of Ax and Olsen Alexander in the final match to be crowned champions!
CP: But not without some help Sparks!
Sparks: Nonetheless! We take you now, to the OG, who have taken the week off and headed home to Compton, California to show off their belts, and as they told me before they left “chill and knock back some 8-balls.”
CP: You are SO white.
We see the OG, sitting on a front porch in lawn chairs, wearing their belts and knocking back some 40 oz. Cans of Old English 800.
Loball: Yo wassup! Big shout out first off to my man Nabby Mike who just got out of the joint! You still owe me ten dollars son!
Smooth-T: And a big shout out to the Horsemen 2k7. You boys ALMOST put ya hands on these belts, but like we say around the CPT, “almost” only counts in Dime bags and Drive Bys.
Loball: Ha! Word! Don’t worry though, if you boys had maybe had more skillz, you would have put ya hands on these phat belts yo!
Smooth-T: As it is, you see, we gonna keep em’ nice and shiny. Fat Jones at the Border Street Pawn Shop told us these belts could bring us at LEAST fifty dollars!
Loball: Word yo! In fact, I might have to pawn mine off in a few days. Funds is getting low and I gotsta keep myself in hooch and hobags!
Smooth-T: Dat’s right. We gonna be back next week to check out what you folks like to call “da competition,” but we ain’t too worried yo. A bunch of old, washed up dudes, some foreigners ,and some crazy ass bitches who will get my boot dead up their ass if they even eyeball these belts the wrong way yo!
Loball: Word to that little G! So all you posers and wannabes best step off, but if you got the sack, feel free to step up!
Smooth-T: Word! Now we gotta go…we’re late for a seminar about how the modern media enterprises are continuing to propagate negative Afro-American sterotypes in the entertainment industry. Word.
Loball: Word is truth my brotha.
Sparks: Here we are folks, the last match of the second round of our tournament! This should be an interesting one as we see a definite contrast of styles. The brawling tactics of Smashin’ Taz against the oriental repertoire of Silver Dragon!
Both start out measuring one another. Taz lands a double axhandle that doesn’t really phase Silver Dragon, and shifts gear, hooking in a leg lock. No chance of submission from Silver Dragon though folks, heck, chances are he doesn’t even know the word! He rolls out and limps up to his feet, but Taz is on him, never relenting. Silver Dragon tries a kick but Taz catches it! Enziguri! Silver Dragon jumps up and catches Taz in the back of the head with a kick and sends Taz over the top rope and to the outside!
The ref starts the ten count but Taz is back in, charging Silver Dragon and gnawing on his forehead! The crowd answers with boos! They want to see some real wrestling! Silver Dragon knee lifts Taz, and gets the Australian up! Brain buster!!! Taz is prone on the mat! Silver Dragon springboards off the second rope and comes crashing down on Taz! A Cover! One…two…but Taz kicks out! The angry Australian manages to get up and locks in a sleeper! Oh no! Silver Dragon is in trouble folks! Few manage to power out of Smashin’ Taz’s sleeper! He locks that in and holds on like a ferocious animal!
The ref tries Silver Dragons arms…but he’s still in it! He arms stays up! He locks his leg around Taz and trips the Australian to the ground! He’s broken the hold! Both men get up, Taz tries to lock in a DDT but Silver Dragon reverses! He hits the Dragon Suplex!!! Tax is on the mat! Cover! One…two…THREE! Silver Dragon has managed to keep Taz’s shoulders down just long enough to get a three count!
Winner: Silver Dragon via pinfall at 11:20
Sparks: Well folks, still no word on JD Dixon’s disappearance! And it looks like it’s taking it’s toll on the Horsemen! We saw a distracted Sully Blackburn earlier and Olsen is coming to the ring, and he looks out of it! I tell you fans, without the guiding hand of JD Dixon, these Horsemen seem to be going half speed!
Gladiator wastes no time in arm dragging Olsen to the mat and dropping a pair of knees. Olsen scrambles away clutching the arm. Gladiator charges in- right into a bodyslam! He goes down hard fans! Both exchange punches, and the blonde powerhouse locks in a bearhug and is squeezing the life out of Alexander! Alexander tries to fight back and head butts Gladiator, sending the young man to the mat. Olsen is shaking his arm out…he must still be feeling that dropped knee from a moment ago. Pinfall attempt by Alexander, but he only gets a one count. Gladiator hits a elbow to the gut and slaps a full nelson on Olsen…and turns it into a slam! Alexander rolls to the ropes and the ref backs Gladiator up.
Both lock up now, and Olsen scoops Gladiator and hits a massive shoulder breaker! Ow! Gladiator hits the mat and Olsen is on him, going ofr apin..one…two…th…no! Gladiator gets a shoulder up! Olsen is frustrated and starts slamming his head to the mat! Gladiator stops the assault and returns the favor! Olsen tries to roll outside but Gladiator is having none of it! He stops the man, jerking him back in by the tights! Olsen rolls over and kicks the young man in the bread basket! Gladiator is doubled over and Olsen springs to his feet and plants Gladiator with a DDT! Gladiator is out! Olsen picks the young man up by his long flowing blonde locks and looks like he’s going to lock in a sleeper! If he does it’s all over folks! He’s trying…but no! Gladiator reverse and hits the Awesomeness! He covers…one…two...THREE! Gladiator has pinned Olsen and has advanced to the finals!
Winner: Gladiator via pinfall at 9:38
As we return from commercial, in the ring, Salvatore Savage, with Smashin’ Taz standing behind him cracking his knuckles and the Awesome Ones are all in the ring, standing in a circle.Salvatore has a microphone.
Salvatore: I would like The Allies and The Bluebloods to come out to the top of the ramp please.
A moment later both teams, along with Lady Jayne come out
Salvatore: See, back in the old days, you did things the right way. You had a problem with a man, or a team, you called them out and you aired out your differences, in the ring, on a mat like this one right here. Now, I admire what David Diamond is trying to do with the OCW, but facts are facts. It’s not the “old Days” anymore, and this new breed of competitor, well, these jabroni’s just don’t know how to go about doing things the right way!
The crowd, use to booing Savage, actually throws in a few cheers. He continues…
Savage: Take these Horsemen for example. Now, I don’t care who you are, or what your beef is with another grappler, but you don’t EVER put your hands on a lady.
Strucka leans in
Strucka: Yeah! That’s UN-Awesome!!!!!!!!
Salvatore pats him on the shoulder…
Savage: That’s right Strucka. It is “UN-Awesome”. It’s also damn cowardly. And when you do that, there’s only one thing to do. Just like in the old days, you match humility with humility.
The circle of wrestlers part and there is a large black bodybag lying in the ring. Smashin’ Taz stands it on end…
Savage: Lady Jayne, we’ve got a gift for you…
Taz unzips the bag and JD Dixon, clad only in his boxers, streaked with blood and with a piece of duct tape over his mouth, falls to the mat.
Gladiator: That’s totally AWESOME!
From the crowd, Sully Blackburn, Olsen and Ax Alexander all race the ring, and a brawl erupts between the Horsemen and the Allies, Bluebloods and Awesome Ones. Savage and Smashin Taz both bail out of the ring, and Savage is wearing an evil grin on his face. Security storms the ring, separating all teams. At the top of the ramp, David Diamond appears.
David Diamond: Woah there! WOAH I SAID! Looks to me like we got a big ole’ group of folks who can’t play nice! Looks like some folks done went and got their feathers in a ruffle! Well, we can’t be having all of these attacks and chaos! he points at the ring.
You boys got some issues to settle, you are going to have your chance next week! Now, since it wouldn’t be fair to throw The Allies: Primetime, Khruschev and the Bluebloods…that is what you fellas are calling yourselves now, right? Right, it wouldn’t be fair to pit all four of the Allies and those tall cool drinks of water known as the Awesome Ones…since it wouldn’t be fair or right to toss all six of those fine you lads against you Horsemen, here’s what we’re gonna do!
Next week, in that very ring, we’re gonna have us a Texas Bunkhouse Brawl! That’s right! You boys can come in your street clothes, you can bring trash cans, tables, ball bats…whatever ya want! You bring it down to the ring, you climb on in there, and we let it all hang out! Just like me and my daddy Big Earl used to do when we had a couple of cow-pokes who didn’t get along, all fussin’ and fightin’, usually over some lil’ Mexican blackbird! No offense Margharita, I know you’re in the back! You boys are going to go at it, and the first one pinned looses for his team! Now maybe THAT will get some of that fire out of ya britches! But knowing all of you, I don’t believe for a New York minute that it will.
Blair grabs the microphone
Blair: Whoa there yourself pal! Who exactly will be on these teams?
Diamond: Ah yeah! Almost forgot! Well, like I said, since it wouldn’t be fair to have a six on four match, we’re going to go with an Eight Man throwdown! The Allies vs The Horsemen! That way all teams involved get to get a little piece of the action. That’s it and that’s how it’s going to be! That’s going to be your Main Event for Next week's OCW Meltdown! Now security, get those asses out of my ring! We got a show to run here!
Salvatore Savage: Hey! What about my team!?!
Diamond: Aw yeah. The Awesome Ones. Savage, your boys are going to be going toe to toe with the wildest damn team in the OCW...The Hellcats! The winner of your match is going to go up against the #2 contender to that tag gold..the Super Dragons!! Whoever can beat those Japanese buzzsaws takes over that #2 spot!
Diamond goes to leave, stops, and turns back around…
Diamond: And one last thing boys. You better rest up, cause a Texas Bunkhouse Match is going to test you for all you are worth.
We fade to commercial…
Sparks: What a night folks! This program just keeps getting wilder and wilder! I don’t expect that to change, as we have the big Thunder God Thor going head to head with Silver Dragon! The winner of this bout goes on to face the young powerhouse Gladiator for the TV Title! These two certainly have history, even in the first week of the OCW! Fans will recall that Silver Dragon let loose with some of that deadly green mist during the battle royal last week, and it could be argued that it cost the Thunder God the potential to be the last grappler to be eliminated, or, if things had gone differently, he might even have been crowned champion!
Silver Dragon is in the ring, hunkered down in his corner. Thor steps through the ropes and meets Silver Dragon in the center of the ring. Silver Dragon is saying something but it’s obvious Thor has no idea what! Thor looks to the ref and Silver Dragon lands an asian spike to Thor’s throat! The Thunder God wasn’t expecting that and clutches his throat! Silver Dragon lands a series of kicks that throws the big man off balance! He scoops him up…can he get the Thunder God up? He Does! And lands a powerful body slam! Thor is reeling and is trying to get up! Silver Dragon drops a leg across Thors shoulders and scrambles, following up with a full nelson! He’s hanging on like a maniac! Thor can’t seem to get his hands on the wily vet!
But the Thunder God isn’t done yet folks! He’s to his feet, Silver Dragon is still hanging on to that full nelson! And Thor drops backwards onto the mat! Silver Dragon has been crushed under the mighty warriors weight! He’s broken the hold and now Thor lands some kicks of his own! Silver Dragon is scrambling to get out of the way! Thor pursues and picks Silver Dragon up, but the crafty ring vet has other plans and lands a chop to Thor’s massive chest…and it does no good! Thor smiles and head butts the Silver Dragon to the mat! Pinfall attempt! One…two…kick out!
Silver Dragon makes it back to his feet and Thor whips him into the ropes, he tries to catch him coming off, but Silver Dragon ducks, rebounds, and lands a flying elbow smash! Thor hits the mat and Silver Dragon covers! One…two…kick out! Thor isn’t going down that easily! He’s up and Silver Dragon scores a neckbreaker! Thor may be out of this one! Another cover…One...two…thr-no! The Thunder God got a shoulder up! Silver Dragon is up, arguing in Japanese with the ref who’s just shaking his head. Obviously not a Harvard man! Thor is up! He spins Silver Dragon around and lands a kick! Silver Dragon is double over! No! Thor has wrapped those massive arms around his waist!?! THORS HAMMER! He hits the piledriver and almost sends Silver Dragon through the ring! Cover! One…two…THREE! Thor has just advanced in the TV Title Tournament! He will face Gladiator for the belt tonight!!!!
But wait! Silver Dragon is up! Thor’s got his back to him…TURN AROUND! OH MY STARS! Silver Dragon just sprayed that deadly green mist in Thor’s face! Thor is blind! Just like the battle royal! Thor can’t see! No! How will this affect him in the finals? Will he even be able to compete?!? That dang Silver Dragon has bailed out of the ring and he’s smiling wide! What a nasty turn for Thor! Refs have stormed the ring and they are attending to the roaring Thunder God! This certainly doesn’t look good for Thor in the finals folks!
Winner: Thor via pinfall at 11:52
"Your head is mine!"
"You will be just another sacrifice to the living God."
Sparks: Looks like Head Hunter means business folks! He’s on his way to the ring and he’s got his “friend” over his shoulder- that ball bat he had in his interview earlier. He gets in the ring and hangs back…waiting.
Here comes King Cut and his entourage! He’s seated in his sedan chair, talking smack to the crowd! I can honestly say that there are no favorites in this match, just two mean, nasty grapplers looking for some revenge! Cut’s valet, Nyla is leading the entourage, and boy does she not bother wearing much! The sedan chair is brought right up to the ring and cut stands, walking directly onto the ring apron!
We are ready for a match but…wait! Nyla has a microphone and brings it over to the king. Looks like Cut has something to say!
King Cut: Look, peasant. I accept that you feel somehow betrayed by what happened at the battle royal, but you need to accept the truth. If you had lasted until the end, you would have had to go through me, and Head Hunter, you would have found out then, what you are going to find out now: That you simply can’t match up with King Cut!
Sparks: OK! The King has had his say…and Head Hunter is on him! He’s grabbed the King and pulled him over the top rope and into the ring! The ref calls for the bell and Head Hunter lands a clothesline while Nyla is on the apron complaining to the ref! Might as well step on down mam, I don’t think the ref is listening!
Head Hunter picks King Cut up and grips his throat! These two men are roughly the same size folks...both easly over six and a half feet tall and while King Cut likes to show off his muscles, Head Hunter doesn’t show off his physique, but I can tell you he doesn’t want for power! Head Hunter gets King Cut up and CHOKESLAM! King Cut hits hard and rolls to the outside!
Head Hunter follows! Both exchange blows, and King Cut takes off, running around the ring and sliding beneath the bottom rope. Head Hunter follows him in head Hunter catches a foot to the head! Head Hunter is stunned and King Cut goes up to the second rope and comes off with a knee drop to Head Hunter's back! Head Hunter is struggling to get up and King Cut capitalizes on his wounded opponent, landing a kick to the groin!
Ow folks! Head Hunter is going to feel that all week! King Cut is back on Head Hunter and is jamming his thumb in his eye! Head Hunter is mad folks! He’s up and blocks a King Cut forearm smash, whipping him into the turnbuckle! King Cut hits head first and drops to the ground! Head Hunter covers for the pin and Nyla is in the ring! She drops a knee onto the back of Head Hunter! Uh oh! Bad move folks, as Head Hunter has grabbed the valet by the throat and has her up in the air! She’s struggling! Head Hunter looks to the crowd and gestures for the choke slam! Nyla is struggling to get loose! Looks like she is going for a ride- but what’s this!?! King Cut has slithered to the edge of the ring and reached down to the timekeepers table…and he has Head Hunter's bat!
Head Hunter doesn’t see him! No! King Cut has hit Head Hunter across the shoulders! Head Hunter goes down, dropping Nyla who grips her throat! King Cut is smiling big! He slams that bat against Head Hunters leg! And again! The ref grabs the bat away and calls for the bell! This is terrible! Head hunter is down in the ring and King Cut is celebrating! What a cheap shot! King Cut and Nyla both bail fro the ring, and she looks like she’s still having trouble with her throat, not that the King seems to notice or care!
Winner: Head Hunter via DQ at 7:39
Head HUnter is having trouble walking folks! We can only hope this isn't serious!
"Winning this TV Title would be TOTALLY AWESOME!"
"Gladiator, prepare to feel the wrath of Thor's Hammer!!!
Sparks: This is it folks! The winner of this match becomes the FIRST OCW TV Title Champion and the number one contender to that OCW World Title belt currently strapped around the waist of Crippler Brett Steele.
Gladiator is first out, and he’s getting some last minute advice form his manager, Salvatore Savage! Not sure what is being said, but Gladiator is shaking his head and frowning. Looks like they are in a heated discussion, and finally Gladiator gets in the ring. Thor is on his way out! The Thunder God’s eyes are still bloodshot and it’s obvious he’s having trouble seeing! He’s still toweling that green mist out of his eyes when he steps up onto the ring apron…and Gladiator charges Thor! Thor flies from the ring apron and Thor hits the floor hard!
Gladiator vault the top rope and is on the outside! Savage is gesturing for him to attack the downed Thor and he complies, scooping up Thor and slamming him hard on the floor! Thor can’t see and is out of it! We haven’t even had a bell yet and Gladiator already looks to be the early favorite! I certainly didn’t see this coming folks! I think we all expected a relatively fair match, but apparently not! Gladiator and Savage smell blood in the water and they are going in for the kill!
Gladiator finally rolls back in the ring and the ref is counting! Thor is struggling to get to his feet! What a shame it would be if the Thunder God lost because of a count out! But no! Thor has managed to slide under the bottom rope and is in the ring at the count of seven! Gladiator lands a few knees on Thor’s massive back and rolls him over! One…two…no! Thor kicks out, and Gladiator picks him up by his hair and goes for a suplex, but Thor blocks it and scoop slams the massive Gladiator!
Thor is on a roll! He doesn’t need to see well to grab a handful of long blonde hair and hammers away with a pair of massive forearms and locks in a full nelson! This is certainly a smart strategy as he’s wearing Gladiator down! Gladiator is wearing down! But he’s not giving up and manages to slide a foot under the ropes! The ref calls for Thor to break the hold! Thor does and tried for a quick pin but only gets a two count before Gladiator kicks out. Thor hits a clothesline and Gladiator hits the mat. Thor goes for an elbow drop but Gladiator moves and Thor hits the mat hard! Gladiator is on his feet and starts unleashing some boots to Thor’s back and neck! He tries a pin but only gets a two count. Thor is back up, blocks another Gladiator forearm and lands one of his own! Gladiator tries to bail out of the ring but Thor stops him, pulls him back in and hits a backbreaker! Gladiator is out on the mat and Thor is getting pumped up! Gladiator may be in trouble! Thor hits a suplex and rolls over, going for a cover! But wait! Savage is on the ring apron! He’s jawing at the ref! The ref is trying to get Savage off the ring apron! Thor breaks the hold and charges over to Savage and grabs the manager by the neck! Savage is in trouble! But what’s this!?! He’s tossed his cane in the ring and Thor and the ref didn’t see it! The ref is between Thor and Savage and Gladiator is back on his feet, and he’s got the cane in his hands! He’s looking at the cane, at Thor…back at the cane! Is he going to do it? He closes with the Thunder God…and swings!
No! Thor moved and the cane went across the ref’s back! Poor old Lou Panera, who is easily in his early nineties, just went down! Thor has turned and smacked the cane out of Gladiator s hands! He headbutts him and goes for the pin, but there isn’t a ref! One..Two…Three…Four! Thor would have the title by now but the ref is out!
Savage is in the ring and drops an elbow on Thor! Thor gets up and corners Savage in the ring! The old manager is looking for a way out! Gladiator is back up, he picks up the cane again…he could knock out Thor cold! But he doesn’t! he tosses the cane aside and spins Thor around, who catches Gladiator with a short arm clothesline! Gladiator rebounds off the ropes and right into a big Thor boot! The Thunder God wraps his massive arms around Gladiators waist!
THOR’S HAMMER! Thor hits his signature piledriver and covers! Here comes another ref in the ring! One…Two…THREE! THOR TAKES HOME THE TITLE ! THOR IS THE NEW TV TITLE CHAMPION! Savage looks angry on the outside folks, and wals away in disgust, leaving Gladiator lying in the ring to fend for himself! But the Thunder God is more interested in his new title belt that the ref is strapping around his waist! Say hello to your first ever TV Title Champion folks!
Winner and NEW OCW TV TITLE CHAMPION: Thor via pinfall at 14:04
Sparks: Well fans, as promised, we have the NEW OCW World Heavyweight Champion with us tonight.|
CP: Damn right Sparks! Crippler Bret Steele outlasted over thirty other competitors to take home the gold at Dawn of Champions.
Sparks: I’m not sure I would say he “outlasted” CP, he used some chicanery to walk away with that title. In MY eyes his title reign is already tainted.
CP: You wear glasses, right?
Sparks: Well, yeah.
CP: Right. So that says a lot about “your” eyes.
Sparks: Let’s go to the champ who’s in the ring now!
CP: I’m just saying.
In the ring, Crippler Bret Steele is with a microphone. He's wearing street clothes and has his OCW world title belt around his waist. He smiles, dips his sunglasses, and leans across the rope, speaking to the fans who greet him with the roar of booing.|
Crippler Bret Steele: "I am the ladies' delight,
the fire in the night, The first ever OCW World Heavyweight Champion.
I don't need face paint. I don't need a mask, or pyro, or a tramp in a skirt distracting my opponents. I don't need a roll of quarters, chairs, tables, sledgehammers ... (hold up hands) these are my weapons. When I lock these hands together around an opponent, it's all over.
You see, I'm a wrestler. I'm not a freakshow. I'm not a juiced up, muscle-bound moron with a needle up his ass, trying to look like I stepped out of the pages of a Weider magazine. I'm not some Hollywood actor. I'm not a has-been football player looking for one more payday. I'm a throwback to another time, another breed. I'm the last of my kind, one born out of time.
All you pretenders out there, where were you when I was winning Russian Sambo tournaments? When I was dominating the NCAA in Minnesota? When I was living out of the back of a car, trying to earn enough money for wrestling school, then getting $30 paydays in some hell-hole on the independent circuit, honing my skill, living for the day I'd be the World Champion, as I always knew I would be?
Where were you when I was ten years old, studying the greats, ordering tapes from Japan, scraping money together to see Flair and Steamboat? Where were you when Lawler beat Von Erich in a bloodbath? Where were you when Anderson held up those four fingers for the first time? Where were you when Malenko and Guerrero put on clinic after clinic in the ECW arena and where the hell were you the day that Pillman died?
You judge me for taking advantage of the rules of a match, for using my brains to win a battle royal -- a match that favors muscle-bound morons? Hey, I trained to pin mens shoulders to the mat. I trained to snap elbows and ankles, to make men tap. That's wrestling. This isn't about watching some behometh throw someone over a rope. That's how it should end? Not in my yard. You throw me over the top, I climb back in, drop you on your neck and lock in a juji gatame arm bar. I choke you out with my Punjab Lasso.
So you wanna change the rules, the ancient rules of wrestling ... some freakshow battle royal where the winner doesn't have to have skills? Doesn't have to know how to secure a pinfall or make a man tap? Fine; I work within those rules and I outsmart everyone.
And then you hate me for it. You should hate yourselves. Your lazy, starry-eyed selves, looking to cash in on some fame in the Sport of Kings, then go off to Hollywood and make your little movies. Well, you're not going to disrespect the Sport of Kings while the King of Sports is here.
This ring is my home. The rest of you? You don't belong here. You're not one of us. Me, Flair, Bockwinkel, Funk, Race, Backlund, Sammartino, Rogers, Thez. You're not in this lineage. You make me sick.
So step on up if you must. Try your skills in a wrestling match. Wrestling. One on one, man-to-man. Think you're the best? I don't think so. Not while I'm here. Because I'm not just the best there is, I'm ALL there is.
The music of 2001: A Space Odyssey brings out “The Nature Boy” Dic Blair. He struts to the ring, his shimmering robes catching every glint of spotlight. Steele rolls his eyes as the Nature Boy ascends the stairs, turns to the crowd and gives a “WOOOOOOOOOOOO!”. They WOOOOOOOOO! Back and he steps through the ring ropes, producing a microphone and stepping up to Steele, nods. Both have a staredown that goes on for at least a minute before Blair speaks.
Dic Blair: “Steele, It looks to the Nature Boy like you got a chip on your shoulder. Well PAL, I’m ready to knock it off there, along with that smug grin-right off your face.”
Steele: “You are? And, I’m sorry, who are you exactly? I didn’t catch you in the TV Title Tournament, which means you didn’t even make it to the finals and aren’t even a ranked contender for this... He slaps the gold title belt around his waist. And if you aren't ranked, you aren't getting a title shot.”
Dic Blair:” I’m not ranked? What about you? Who did you beat for that title? NOBODY. HA! You talk about wrestling the way it used to be, the way it was, well pal, the past, present AND future is standing toe to toe with you right now. So remember this, To be THE MAN, You have to beat THE MAN, and pal, THE MAN is in the ring right now, and he’s ready for a match!. In fact, I don't need for this to be a title shot-this match will be just to show you the beating that’s waiting for you when I DO decide to lay claim to what is rightfully mine! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”
Steele nods, both throw their microphones down and we’ve got a match!
Sparks: This is it fans! We didn’t expect another main event match tonight but it looks like we’ve got one anyway! Blair has challenged Steele to a Non-Title match to determine who’s “the man”, and this should be a good one! Both are classically trained grapplers, so I don’t expect to see any wild extreme rules or insane death defying moves here folks- just good sound wrestling!
Blair drops his robe off and Steele, who’s still in his jeans and tennis shoes looks like they are both ready to go! We get a bell and this match is underway! Blair starts off with a pair of chops that Steele takes in stride, landing a few of his own. Both back up and Steele goes in to lock up and walks right into an armdrag takedown! Blair misses Steele’s hair and lets him go. He’s pointing to his chest and saying something about being the man. Steele snaps and charges back in! And gets scoop slammed to the mat!
Steele bounces up to one knee and Blair lets out with a “WOOOOOOOOOOO!” Steele is upset and gets up, shaking it off. They lock up and Blair lands a forearm to the top of Steele’s head! Steele hits the ground, but sweeps Blair’s leg! Blair is down! Steele, like a panther on his prey, moves in and grabs Blair’s wrist and, tying it up, twists! Steele is no slacker folks! Say what you will, but this grappler is as real as they come and he’s twisting Blair’s wrist to the point of breaking but the Horseman refuses to tap!
Blair is able to get to the ropes and the ref calls for Steel to break the hold, but Steele takes his own sweet time! No rush there folks, this former Russian Sambo fighter has a killer instinct and knows that to beat Blair he’s going to have to keep him off balance! Steele “helps” Blair up and hoists him up! Suplex! Blair is trying to get up, and Steele is hanging back, letting the dazed Blair get to his feet. Clothesline! Steele hits a flying lariat clothesline that puts Blair on the mat! Blair is in trouble folks, Steele charges back in, but Blair moves and puts him head first into the turnbuckle! Steele bounds off like he’s made of rubber and hits the ground! Step over toehold by Blair! He goes for a pin on the champ and only gets a two count. But Blair seems to be back on his game, though he’s still favoring his left arm that was victim to the wrist lock!
Blair scoops up Steele and lands a devastating backbreaker! Steele felt that one folks! Blair is in total control now, and is strutting in the ring! He goes back to Steele and covers…one...two...but Steele kicks out! Blair lands a closed fist to the forehead! Steele stumbles back into the corner! Blair follows him and bounces up onto the bottom rope! Slap! Blair lands another slap! Another! He follows it up with a “WOOOOOOO!” but wait! Steele has wrapped his arms around Blair’s waist! He comes out of the corner and plants Blair in the center of the ring! Blair is stunned! Steele makes his move! PUNJAB LASSO! He’s got Blair locked in! This submission hold is vicious folks! Steele is really leaning back, really giving it all he’s got! Blair’s hand is hovering above the mat, it’s hanging there! He may tap! He’s about ready to! He’s tapp…wait! The Horsemen have hit the ring! Steele releases the hold and rolls out!
He’s no fool folks! He wants nothing to do with a one on four situation! Dixon is noticeably absent! Ax has helped up Blair and they are holding lairs hand up! The ref seems to have other ideas! Steele has grabbed his OCW World Belt off of the timekeepers table and is in the aisle. Lets hear what the ref has to say!
Ref: Your winner…via submission…CRIPPLER BRET STEELE!
Winner and still OCW World champion: Crippler Brett Steele via submission at 14:39
Sparks : Oh my word folks! The Horsemen are livid! They’ve jumped the ref and are stomping a mudhole in him! Apparently they think they reached the ring in time to save Blair the loss but the record books will show otherwise!
Blair is screaming something at Steele who’s slowly backing away up the ramp, smiling and rubbing his hand along his Championship belt! We’ll see you next week fans! This is Scooter Sparks for Corporal Punishment saying ‘GOODNIGHT!!!’”