We go from station identification to a shot of Dusty Diamond. She’s in her office, slightly different from the last office we saw, same furniture but the room is more run down. She’s addressing someone off camera…|
Dusty: I’m glad you came as quickly as you did. That old security staff was bleeding me dry and kept as much order around here as Helen Keller on a Merry-Go-Round. Anyway, I’m glad you and your men are here and I trust you have the experience to handle the OCW. Well? Go ahead.
We pull back to se Mentalo, who turns to a group of masked luchadores in combat fatigues with flak vests that reads “OCW Security” across the front. All are armed with vicious looking cattle prods. Mentalo translates what Dusty said to the group in spanish. The leader, a large man in a red mask sporting a skull/cobra design nods and speaks to Mentalo .
Mentalo: Serpentalica says he understands Miss Diamond and he assures you his team has more than enough experience to deal with the OCW’s roster.
Dusty: Good, the OCW is a dangerous place, but you are reportedly dangerous men, and since you can’t get work in your homeland anymore, never forget that I am doing you a favor and giving you a paycheck and place to stay. I only ask that you swear undying loyalty to me and you all wear towels when coming to and from the locker room, I don’t need another incident like the one I had with that guy in the shark mask.
Mentalo translates and the shark masked wrestler quietly moves to the back of the group while Serpentalica responds.
Mentalo: Serpentalica apologizes for El Tiburon Miss Diamond, he says he didn’t realize the small washcloths were for your hands.
Dusty: Whatever! Look, do a good job and I’ll make sure you do well in the OCW. Hell, I might even give you jobs as wrestlers or trainers or something, for those of you who can still wrestle anyway. So, do we have ourselves a deal?
Mentalo translates and the red cobra-masked wrestler nods and thrusts his arm up in the air.
Serpentalica: VIVA LOS RUDOS!
Dusty: Yeah, okay, whatever. Just make sure no one gets killed tonight. Mentalo, get “Los Security” out of here and get them to work.
Mentalo translates and the group nods, moving off, except Mentalo and the shark-masked luchadore who remains standing and staring at Dusty. She looks up from her computer monitor and rolls her eyes.
Dusty: Mentalo, tell this freak to get out of my sight.
Mentalo: Si Miss Diamond…
Dusty: And tell him to shave.
Mentalo: But Miss Diamond, he’s wearing a mask…
Dusty: I know, I wasn’t talking about his face.
We go to the Monday Night Meltdown Intro!!!! Scooter Sparks and Corporal Punishment are at the announcer’s table in the new weekly Monday Night Meltdown arena located in the West End of Louisville, Kentucky. The new digs appears to be an old abandoned factory or possibly slaughterhouse made of brick and mortar and cleared out of all machinery to make room for the wrestling ring and perhaps two hundred spectators. In the rear of the building the gigantitron and wrestler entrance has been erected, off to it’s left is situated the announcers table.
Scooter Sparks: Welcome OCW fans to Monday Night Meltdown!!! We are coming to you LIVE from the new OCW arena in Louisville, Kentucky! Just a few blocks from the majestic Ohio River where we…
Corporal Punishment: …have been killing rats all freaking night! This place is a damn dump Sparks!
Sparks: Now CP, that’s not very fair. This building has a lot of history…
CP: That’s just a way of saying it’s old. It’s old, run-down and about to freaking collapse! I’m guessing the Louisville Fire Marshall must be enjoying a nice new yacht or something to allow matches to be held in this place!
Sparks: Well CP, I admit, it’s got it’s own unique “flavor” but I think in time we’ll come to see it as our new home, a new beginning for the OCW and it’s growing roster!
CP: Your Momma been slipping happy pills into your Capri Sun’s again Sparks? This place is a freakin’ run-down death trap and it’s only a matter of time before one of these columns give way and we’re all killed. We could have hundreds of OCW fans dead in here Sparks! It would be a blow to planned parenthood clinics and soup kitchens all over the region!
Sparks: Look, CP, I’m getting the feeling all of this rage isn’t just about the new arena, is it? Could all of this have something to do with your daughter, Major Punishment coming to your aid last week and challenging the Hellcats on your behalf?
CP: Look Scooter, this is family business and you ain’t family! I tried to tell MP to stay away from the Army of Darkness but she wouldn’t listen, she’s too much like her old man-tough as a three dollar steak! She goes out and wipes out a few dozen terrorist cells and she thinks she can do anything! Damn women’s lib!
Sparks: Few dozen…my word she sounds absolutely delightful! I can’t believe you never introduced me before!
CP: …Oh, I’m sorry, would you like to come to dinner next week?
Sparks: Me? Really?
CP: Well sure Scooter, I’ll have the wife whip up a nice pot roast, an apple pie and some homemade lemonade…
Sparks: That’s my favorite meal, how did you know that?
CP: I didn’t.
Sparks: Well that sounds just great!
CP: Sure! And when we sit down to eat I’LL BEAT YOUR ASS AND CRACK YOUR SKULL LIKE A GARDEN GNOME! HOW DOES THAT SOUND!?!
Sparks: Please don’t kill me.
CP: Aw, I’m sorry Sparks, I’m just a little tightly wound up. MP’s got a match tonight versus Barb Wire and well, I shouldn’t take it out on you, I’m sorry.
Sparks: Really? You’re sorry?
CP: Of course not ya wide-eyed Oompa-Loompa.
Sparks: Figures. Well, anyway fans, last week saw the crowning of a new TV Champion when Lil’ Tokyo managed to make her way through a sixteen person tournament, finally beating Roland Hard in the finals to take home the title. Afterwards however, she was brutally attacked by former partner Yojimbo and his new stable, Black Sun! We’ve got the TV Champ with us tonight and she’s going to address the incident and more!
CP: Going to be an interesting night Sparks! We’ve also got The Hangmen taking on former tag champs the Super Dragons and of course that big contract on a chain match between Smashin’ Taz and Strucka! After tonight one of them will be scraping gum off the bottom of park benches for dinner!
Sparks: That’s right fans! And the next OCW PPV is upon us! RESURRECTION!!! It looks like it’s going to be one wild night for all of the stars of the OCW! But lets get this show kicked off with a bang! Our first match is a six man tag match! We’ve got Toxic Shock and Razor Girl going up against The OG and TJ Danger!
CP: Razor girl? I think I still have some of her makeup smeared on my mask from last week…
Sparks: Yeah, you really gave her a good shot.
CP: That bitch is nuts Sparks. If I was twenty years younger I might have put a ring on her finger after the beatdown she gave me.
CP: Says you. Here comes the Army of Darkness Sparks, now, I promise to not get personally involved with their goings on tonight. You just need to understand that as a father, well, I’m going to look out for my little girl. I remember when she first came home from kindergarten, she’s made her first mask out of paper mache’ and had a note from the teacher asking me to come to discuss her putting little Zack Meyer in a Texas Cloverleaf, it was adorable.
Sparks: Wow, you getting all misty eyed over there CP?
CP: HELL NO! It’s the damn asbestos in this dump floating into my eyes! Karen Silkwood had better working conditions than this!
Sparks: Well, fans will remember Toxic Shock is almost a franchise of sorts, after getting beat within an inch of their lives in a match against the Hellcats they stunned the OCW by joining Mr.Lucifer and his insane stable. Since Barb is in a match tonight her counterpart Razor Girl is teaming with Toxic Shock against the OG and their partner, TJ Danger!
CP: Oh yeah, Jorum. I’m surprised he’s wrestling and not panhandling for change in the parking lot!
Sparks: Apparently Miss Diamond saw something she liked in the young man CP, cause he’s still employed!
Alright, the ref has called for the bell and we’ve got Razor Girl and Danger starting out. Lock up, Danger goes for an armbar but Razor Girl laughs like a hyena and powers out! Forearms to Danger’s face! He goes down and Toxic Shock comes in and they’re all stomping him into the mat! Here comes The OG! Free for all in the ring! Alright, the ref has it straightened out!
Creeper in now against Loball fans, a bit of back and forth, a few armdrags, a reversal, no one getting the upper hands, wait, Creeper just landed a scissors kick to Loball! He’s out! Cover! Two count only!
Tag into Crypt! Crypt commences to biting! Loball scrambles back and tags out to Smooth T who comes in and taunts Crypt! Crypt jus tilts his head and watches with interest, WOAH! Crypt just short armed clotheslined Smooth T! He’s stomping him like a garter snake and goes for a pin! Two count! Loball in to break it up!
Tag to Creeper and they send Smooth T in to the ropes and double clothesline! Creeper with a cover, two count again! Creeper picks up Smooth T and locks in a torture rack! He’s working it! Looks like he’s about to give..no! Save by Loball! All six are in the ring! TJ Danger lands a cross body block on Razor Girl! The OG have Crypt up, looks like they might try a piledriver- save by Creeper! The ref clears everyone out and we’ve got Loball and Razor Girl in the ring, he’s using closed fists to nail her! She’s still stunned by that cross body from Danger! Loball isn’t wasting any time! Sidewalk slam! Now he’s got the Compton Clutch locked in and really rearing back! He’s screaming for her to tap but it’s not happening fans! Razor Girl is just too insane to give up!
Out of frustration Loball finally breaks the hold, throws her into the corner and tags in TJ Danger, they both put the boots to her! She’s down in the corner, wait…bronco buster! TJ Danger is just dropping his junk right on her face! Oooh, she’s furious fans! He’s celebrating, doesn’t realize she’s up…KICK TO GROIN! Oh fans, TJ Danger has hit the mat like a hobo on a futon! Razor Girl is just stomping him into the mat with a vengeance!
OG in the ring to lend assistance but we’ve got another six way brawl! It’s spilled outside! Wait! Smooth T has snuck back inside and smashed Razor Girl with a chair! TJ Danger is back up, he’s dazed! Grabbing his crotch! Wild eyed! He grabs the nearest target- uh oh! He’ grabbed Old Lou! The ref! SPINNING NECKBREAKER ON OLD LOU! TJ Danger has lost it and is beating the hell out of the ref! The Army of Darkness has bailed out of the ring! TJ has lost it! That stomp to his nuts must have released some sort of testosterone reserve and now we’ve got a form of roid rage or something! He’s not letting up! WAIT! Here comes “Los Security”! They’re storming the ring! The OG has bailed fans and all participants are watching from the aisle!
OH NO! Los Security is stabbing TJ Danger with those cattle prods like some sort of animal! He’s foaming at the mouth and shaking uncontrollably! He’s neutralized fans! TJ Danger is jerking like a hooked catfish and curling into a fetal position!
Well fans! I guess we just got a taste of what awaits those who don’t know when to quit in the OCW!
Winner: Toxic Shock and Razor Girl via DQ @ 14:17
Sparks: Wow CP! Los Security really seems to be quite a, deterrent, wouldn’t you say?
CP: I’d say it looks like Dusty Diamond is on the cheap Sparks! First this building, now the regular security gets let go in favor of a bunch of luchadores with cattle prods? If our production staff wasn’t a bunch of first year communication students from the local college I might get…
Sparks: Ooops, looks like the Corporal has some mike troubles fans! Well, before we continue, our well wishes go out to Miss Bling who, after her beatdown at the hands of Margharita last week has been admitted to the hospital for a concussion. No ETA on when she will return, but we certainly wish her a speedy recovery. Now we’ve got our “Sweet Chocolate on the Scene” Jackie Midnight in the back with Strucka who is about to fight for his job! Jackie take it away!
Jackie Midnight: Thanks Scooter! Call me Sweet Chocolate again and I’ll beat your ass. Well fans, up next we’ve got a contract on a wire match where my guest Strucka will be going head to head with the Australian spitfire, Smashin’ Taz to see who gets to keep their job! Strucka, Miss Diamond gave you a whole week to “clean your ass up”. I see you’ve got a haircut and are sporting some new ink, is this a sign that you’ve turned a corner?
Strucka: Uh, like, there are a few corners to turn Jackie, this building is like, a maze and this interview area is like, parked in the middle of nowhere.
Jackie Midnight:I mean is your new look indicative of a change in the direction of your career?
Jackie Midnight: INDICATIVE…
Strucka: Ind…I’m sorry, I don’t speak Jive. Can you like, you know, speak English?
Jackie Midnight: Lord, I should have interviewed Taz. What I’m asking Strucka is did you clean your goofy ass up and get off the damn weed and steroids? Are you clean son? If I was LMPD and busted your ass right now would I be taking you downtown? Is that clear enough!?!
Strucka: Woah, not cool lady, you know, I don’t like, dig the pressure of your questions you know? You aren’t my social worker, I mean, you aren’t, are you? I can’t tell cause she doesn’t wear a mask, though she does got a patch over one eye. She said her old man put a Kool out in it when they got in a fight over him burning her favorite spoons…
Jackie: Wow, well after talking to you all I have to say is, good luck in whatever you do after you leave the OCW.
Strucka: Hey thanks. Look if you are free later I could show you my van. The guy who did my ink also painted a mural of me slaying a dragon with a banjo while riding a shark . It’s totally badass.
Jackie Midnight: I’m sure. Back…
Strucka: Like a freaking Ozzy album cover, you know? Or Meatloaf…definitely Meatloaf before he got super fat…
Jackie Midnight: Unbelievable. Well back to you…
Strucka: Oh man, meatloaf. Now I’m hungry. You want to go to Ho Jo’s tonight? You’ll have to pay cause like, I spent all of my petty cash on the mural, light beer and uh, like “herbal tea” for my celebration party afterwards. Heh…
Jackie Midnight: Of course you did. Back to…
Strucka: “Herbal tea”, get it?
Jackie Midnight: Right, Back…
Strucka: Pssst! “HERBAL” tea. You follow? Huh?
Jackie Midnight: Do me a favor and go put your head in an oven, ok? Back to you Scooter. Quit touching my hair burnout!
Sparks: Wow, I have no idea what to say to that interview…
CP: I do. “You winner, Smashin’ Taz!” Why even bother with the match Sparks? Instead why don’t we go outside and watch the homeless fight over the snack bar’s grease trap.
Sparks: Ugh. Well fans, Smashin’ Taz is on his way to the ring, and looks extremely confident!
Cp: How can you even tell Sparks? The lighting in this building blows balls! Hell, even the fans look decent! Anyone watching at home might even think most of them have all their teeth!
Sparks: You know, I’m starting to understand why you have to park inside the building…
CP: What? The caddy is a classic! You don’t park a classic like that outside!
Sparks: Alright fans, Strucka is making his way to the ring and the ring crew has already hung that briefcase containing the OCW contract from a chain hanging above the ring! The rules are simple fans! Use the ladder positioned outside of the ring to climb up there and grab that briefcase! The first one who does gets to keep his job! The loser? Well, they get to experience first hand the abysmal Kentucky workforce development infrastructure! Alright, Strucka has found his way to the ring and we’ve got our match!
Sparks: Strucka starting out by extending his hand! Smashin’ Taz slaps it away and spits in his face! Strucka is stunned! He says something to Taz, I’m guessing along the lines of “not cool” and Taz responds with a closed fist!
Strucka hits the ground and Taz picks him up by the hair! Good thing he got those golden locks chopped down fans or that might really hurt! Taz with another fist and the ref warns him! Strucka is down fans! Taz isn’t wasting any time! He’s on the way outside of the ring and brings that ladder back in! Strucka watches in stunned amazement!
Taz is back in the ring and Strucka shoulderblocks him to the ground! Finally the stoner…uh…grappler is showing some life! He’s snap-mared Taz to the mat and locked in a half nelson!
Taz is working his way back up fans! Elbow to Strucka midsection! Another! Strucka is doubled over! Taz has him up! Suplex onto the ladder! Oh fans! Strucka is hurting from that! But Taz can’t use the ladder with a passed out Strucka on it, so he leg drops him! Right across the throat fans! Strucka is just being brutalized in this match!
Taz has pulled him off and has set up the ladder! He’s climbing! Wait! Strucka sees what is happening! He manages to kick at the ladder and Taz is on shaky ground! He retreats back down the ladder to beat down Strucka some more! The former Awesome One isn’t looking so Awesome now! Smashin’ Taz has dominated this match!
He lands another fist and folds up the ladder and rams Strucka with it! Strucka blocks! They are fighting for the ladder! Strucka grabs it loose and spins! The ref ducks just in time fans! He’s spinning- and catches Taz! Taz just got flattened! Strucka as well as the rest of the fans are stunned!
Strucka must not be too out of it fans! He’s set up the ladder and slowly climbing to the top! Wait! Taz is up and sees his chances at gainful employment slipping away! He’s going up the other side of the ladder too! They are both at the top! That briefcase is just a few feet away! They are exchanging blows! Right fist from Taz! Right from Strucka! That ladder is shaking terribly fans! Taz leaps for the briefcase and is hanging on to it for dear life! His short little Australian legs have left the ladder and now he’s just hanging there! Strucka has jumped up too! Both are hanging off of the case and twisting in the wind! WOAH! There goes the ladder fans! They are both hanging twenty feet up in the air with nothing but wrestling ring far below! Taz is trying to bite Strucka! Strucka uses his long legs to wrap them around Taz and pull him free of the case! Taz is at Strucka’s mercy! He’s got his legs locked around the Australian and Taz is helpless! Strucka lets go!!! Taz just fell to the mat fans! Oh he hit hard! His leg just buckled! He’s down fans and Strucka is still hanging from that briefcase!
I guess Strucka is our winner fans, though we’ll have to wait for the ref to set the ladder up so he can get back down! Wait! The ref is calling for help from the back! Taz is down and it looks like he’s injured his leg! Here comes Los Security! Thank goodness! They can help Taz to the back and make sure no one interferes with…WHAT THE HELL!?!? LOS SECURITY IS JABBING TAZ WITH THOSE CATTLEPRODS!!!
OH MY GOD! What are they doing!?!? Taz is helpless in the ring fans! He can’t move and now he’s jerking uncontrollably while these thugs just stun him senseless! Wait! Mentalo is coming out to the ring and screaming at them! They’ve stopped! Now they are attending to Taz and carrying him out of the ring! Here come the EMT’s! Los Security is helping Taz onto the stretcher!
What the hell was that fans!?! These guys need a full time translator! It’s not like Taz didn’t have enough problems!
Well, Smashin’ Taz is no longer employed by OCW fans, and your winner Strucka is still hanging from the briefcase up in the rafters.
Winner: Strucka @ 13:54
We are back in Dusty’s office. She is on the phone..
Dusty: I don’t know what went wrong!!! I told them to go and take care of Taz!!! No I didn’t mean to stun him silly! I meant to make sure he didn’t roll out of the damn ring and break his neck too! Of course I sent Mentalo out to fix it! Of course I didn’t know they didn’t speak a speck of English! Look I’ve got…hang on I’ve got another call coming in. No, don’t worry about it, he’s Australian, if he sues us we’ll just pay him off in kangaroo meat or something. Yeah, bye.
Hello, Dusty Diamond, talk to me. Oh, it’s you. Yeah, hi. How is Bora Bora? Calm down, what the hell is wrong with you? Have you been snorting margarita salt out of your secretary’s navel again? Woah, ease up, it was just a joke. What? No, no one but me and a cameraman.
I don’t know, I figured you used to have one stationed in your office in case anything exciting happened, I just followed suit. Yeah, the red light is on, of course he’s recording, probably turned the damn thing on when my new security staff almost electrocuted Smashin’ Taz to death. Nevermind, it’s a long story. What? Oh sure, I’ll tell him to turn it off right now…
She gives the gesture to keep rolling
Lord! Will you lighten up!?! What has you so…ok, slow down, yes I’m done kidding around. Just tell me what is wrong with you.
Ok, yes, the OCW is running along ok-all things considered. We’re in a new building that will save us a lot of money, I’ve hired a new security staff to handle things around here, I’ve cut some of the fat off of the roster and we’re on schedule for the next PPV, Resurrection. Right, just like in your notes. So, yeah, everything is running smoothly. Now you want to explain why you sound like someone just stole your Randy Savage Pillow Partner?
A dream? A nightmare you say? Well tell me about it. Oh come on, it was just a dream, man up for Gods sake and tell me, it’ll cost you a few grand if you go to a shrink and I can use that money to get a working air conditioner put in here.
Ok…you’re in a town…uh huh,…sky was on fire…attacked, captured, and tortured by small zombie-like children…weird but I think that means you need to quit dating girls still in their teens…ok! I’m listening! Taken to the OCW arena and made to watch as they incinerated the building and slaughtered everyone inside like vicious animals…Right, no I think it’s a good idea you aren’t here right now, the new building is an old slaughterhouse. NO, I’m not kidding. Well go on…uh huh…and. just before you woke up you saw a face, that seemed familiar and had a scar running across the mouth. Wow! That was some dream! No really, you know I had a nightmare too! Yeah! In it I was a successful business woman working on Madison Avenue, and got a call to come down to Armpit, Kentucky to take over my fathers failing business! Oh it gets better! Instead of little kids trying to torture and kill me, it’s full-grown adults in crazy second-hand Halloween costumes and they are ending my life slowly, one minute at a time with their stupidity! You know what the worst part was? WHEN I WOKE UP AND REALIZED IT WASN”T A FREAKING DREAM!
I’m busy! Now stop licking the back of those damn frogs down there and quit calling me!!!
She slams the phone down and shakes her head
Dusty: Nightmares, that’s great, that’s just what the OCW needs.
Cp: What the hell was that all about? Diamond disappears and the first we hear from him he’s calling here to talk about some nightmare?
You know, this spooky building is getting to everyone! I tell ya, we should have just set up shop in a bingo hall. It worked for other promotions! Sure they smell like stale Lucky Strikes and Polident, but at least you could see the damn ceiling! Amirite? Heh. Scooter? You awake over there son? Am I a solo act tonight?
Sparks: I…I also had a nightmare the other night. I was in bed, and I woke up, and there were…beetles…everywhere, coming towards me. I, I got up and tried to run away, and blocking my way, a huge man, in, in a large pyramid shaped mask…dragging a sword. He, he rose it as if to cut me, and as his head raised I saw just the bottom of his face, and he had a scar. A small scar on his mouth, just like what David Diamond saw. I…I woke up, and….
CP: Beetles huh?
Sparks: Yea…yes. Large black beetles.
CP: You mean…like THIS ONE!?!?
CP throws a beetle onto Scooter!!!
CP: BWHAHAHAHAHA!!!! HA HA!!!! Oh man that’s funny!!!! Calm down Francis!! It’s just a bug!
Sparks: DAMMIT CP!!!!
CP: Oh calm down Scooter! Look at this dump! Between the rats, bugs and freaking lowlifes who needs to have nightmares? Your nightmare sounds like a freaking weekend in Aspen compared to the trip I had to take to use the john in this dump! You think some guy in a pyramid mask is scary? Try using the can when the guy in the stall next to you is drunk out of his mind on Everclear and ate one too many Baja Chalupas! I had to stand in a bucket of bleach for ten minutes just before I even came out here tonight!
Sparks: You threw a bug at me.
CP: Be glad it wasn’t hot tea.
Sparks: We’ll be right back fans.
We go to commercial! When we return Kai is in the ring with Roland Hard Kai has the microphone and is addressing the crowd and Hard.
Kai: Many people think my loss last week was because of my brothers death, and it was not. The title just doesn’t really interest me right now, not yet anyway…
Roland grabs the mic! Roland Hard: Well look here Big Man, I don’t care if you lookin’ to go after a title or not, you got me and this Blood Rage freak in a triple threat match tonight, right now! Now I know Dusty put you in cause Spartan is still out of action, now, ole’ Roland don’t care about you, but that crazy mother Blood Rage jumped me last week and I plan on getting me some payback! Now, you get in my way tonight Roland is going to take you to school!
Das baws right! So why don’t you jus’ find a nice place to watch what happens and let me take care o’ bidness…
Blood Rage appears from the crowd, slides in the ring and nails Roalnd in the back!!!
Sparks; Oh my fans! Well we’ve got the bell and this triple threat match is on! As Roland mentioned earlier, originally The Spartan was supposed to be in this match, but after the brutal attack last week by Blood Rage he has still yet to recover, so Miss Diamond booked Kai in his place.
I also want to apologize for my…distraction…earlier fans! The nightmare I’d had was just so vivid, and I had forgotten about it until the call from David Diamond came in. Nonetheless! I assure you I’m fine and after a extra dose of medication I’m ready to go!
All three men trading fists in the ring! Blood Rage and Kai are really going at it! Double headbutt to Roland Hard! He goes down fans and Kai and Blood Rage are taking it to the limit!
Kick by Kai doubles up Blood Rage and Kai tries to lock in the arms for an underhook suplex but Blood Rage reverses and dropkicks Kai in the chest! The big man goes down!
Blood Rage kicks Roland in the head and sends him outside! He’s back to Kai who is getting up! Kai with a punch to the abdomen! Blood Rage doubles up and Kai lands a back-kick to the grappler!
Blood Rage goes down! Kai picks him up and sends him into the ropes! Powerslam! Cover! One! Two...Roland Hard breaks up the pin! Roland lands a big splash to Kai and Kai simply rolls off Blood Rage! Roland drags Kai over to the corner and gets on the second rope! Double knee to his gut! Kai is doubled up fans! Roland has that big boot on Kais throat and he’s really leaning in!
But wait! Blood Rage is up! Springboard dropkick to Roland Hard! He caught him right in the face! Now he’s over on Kai and hammering away!
Blood Rage is refocusing on Roland! He’s slamming Roland’s head into the turnbuckle like a ripe melon! Roland is reeling! Kai is up in the corner and Blood Rage whips Roland into him! Oh fans! Roland and Kai just stumble out of the corner and both go down!
Blood Rage pulls Kai up and Kai lands a fist to his throat! Blood Rage wasn’t expecting that and stumbles back! Kai kicks Blood Rage in the gut- CHOKESLAM!
Blood Rage is down! Kai goes for the pin! Kickout by Blood Rage at the two count! Roland is back up and pulls Kai up by his hair! Roland with a fist! Another! Kai is reeling! Roland sends him into the ropes and hits a cross body block! He turns that into a pin! One! Two! Breakup by Blood Rage! Blood Rage throws Roland over the top rope and he’s outside!
Blood Rage and Kai going tooth and nail fans! Neither giving an inch! Rights! Lefts! Clothesline by Blood Rage! These two monsters are huge! Blood Rage goes six-six easy and Kai towers above him by over half a foot!
Kai is back up! Suplex by Kai! He’s locked in a sleeper hold! Blood Rage is stuck in the middle of the ring! Nowhere to go! He’s not giving up though, but Kai is really leaning in! Blood Rage reaches up- eye gouge!! Kai broke the hold and Blood Rage is up and lands a knee to his head!
More closed fists! Kai is busted open fans! He’s bleeding! Blood Rage…well, we can’t tell if he’s bleeding or not with that mask and all…
Kai has Blood Rage by the throat! He slings him into the turnbuckle and goes in! He’s got Blood Rage pinned to the turnbuckle and he’s up on the second rope! He’s hammering Blood Rage, using his head like a speedbag! Blood Rage is stunned!
Kai gets down and bulldogs Blood Rage into the mat! Blood Rage is out of it fans! Kai goes for a pin! One..two…WAIT! Kai has just pulled Blood Rage off of the mat…but why? He had an easy pin right there!
What is he doing? Kai is out of the ring fans! He’s going under the ring…what’s he got? Oh no!!! He’s got Head Hunter’s old baseball bat fans! He’s got that black bat his brother used to use with such ferocity!!!
He’s back in the ring and Blood Rage is trying to make his way to his feet! He has no idea Kai is in there and just measuring him! He’s going to do it fans! He’s going to nail him! BASEBALL BAT TO THE GUT! Blood Rage is doubled over in pain!!! Kai just nailed him with that bat! Oh this has to be it fans!
Kai turns around…ROLLIN POWERSLAM! Roland Hard just came out from ringside and nailed his finisher on Kai!
Roland Hard just took home this victory fans!!! Oh what a match! I thought Kai and Blood Rage were going to beat each other to death!!! But they forgot about Roland Hard and they both paid for it!
Nobody puts Roland in a corner I guess! Roland has bailed out of the ring and Blood Rage has disappeared back into the crowd! Kai is left in the ring fans and he’s getting up and clutching his ribs, his face a bloody mask and he’s looking around…but Blood Rage is long gone! Kai slams a fist to the mat but that isn’t going to bring back a win for him!
Winner: Roland Hard via pinfall @ 17:33
Sparks: What a match fans!
CP: Darn tootin Sparks! I thought Kai and Blood Rage were going to beat each other into a puddle of glue! It’s obvious these two just flat out hate each other! You can see it Sparks, in a way a wrestler hits another wrestler and goes after him, it’s obvious and brutal and you can just tell when two have an axe to grind! I don’t know if these two have a past history or anything but I can guarantee this isn’t the last we’ll see!
Sparks: Well, we’ll see if we can get Jackie to get an interview with Kai fans! And we’ve still got some major action coming for you! The Hangmen and the Super Dragons are set to square off and lets not forget that main event tonight that sees the Corporal’s daughter, Major Punishment going toe to toe with barb Wire of the Hellcats!
CP: Going to be damn hard staying out of that ring Sparks, what with my little girl being in there all alone and after what the AOD did to me last week!
Sparks: Well, We’re professionals CP, lets just try to remember that. We’ll be right back fans!
Back from commercial, we’re in Dusty’s office she looks up and shakes her head.
Dusty: Figured you would be showing up late. Have a seat.
The camera pulls back and we see OCW World Champion Brett Steele smiling. A chorus of boos from the crowd almost drowns out the dialogue. He throws his belt over his shoulder, drops into a chair and kicks his feet up on the corner of Dusty’s desk
Steele: Hey there beautiful. Why don’t you have an office door?
Dusty: I had it removed.
Steele: That’s weird. Why?
Dusty: Long story, and if you ever bothered to turn on Monday Night Meltdown once in a while you’d know why.
Steele: Is that a jab at me not being around? I’m here tonight, right?
Dusty: Right, and it’s a damn good thing you showed up, I was about to strip you of that title.
Steele: Really? And why would that be?
Dusty: You’re due to defend it champ. You have to defend your belt every three weeks and you haven’t defended it since week three. It’s week six, hence you’re due for a title defense
Steele: Woah, back the truck up good lookin’. You need to listen to your own promos. Last week you called for a total reboot of the rankings and won/loss records, right? Well, if that’s the case, then my title defense schedule should have been reset too. Last week should have been week one for the champ, so I shouldn’t have to put this ten pounds of gold up until next week. Besides, since you let the champs grandfather in their old won-lost records while everyone else got set to zero, I have the best record in the OCW.
Dusty: Uh, not quite. Second best, “Champ”.
Steele: Excuse me?
Dusty: You’ve got the second best record, 3-0. Lil’ Tokyo, our new TV Champ has a nice, clean 4-0 record.
Steele: You mean that little Japanese chick? Fujihama Mama or whatever her name is? So, she won that tournament. Big deal. Who did she beat? Really?
Dusty: She beat Damien Genesis, Yojimbo, Primetime Murphy and finally Roland Hard to take that belt.
Steele: I’m not sure I even know half those people. Yojimbo’s a shadow of his former self. Primetime Murphy? The only interaction that kid should have with a wrestling ring is setting one up. And Roland Hard? Are you serious? The only thing he’s missing is a red sweater and a garbage can to beat on. “HEY, HEY, HEY….”
Dusty: Great, the only fat black guy joke you can come up with. Nice. What is your point Steele?
Steele: My point is that look at my record and who I’ve taken down. Thor, TV Champion, wearing a belt he earned by fighting through the best in the OCW. Dic Blair, who, while he was a goof and a wannabe, at least had some wrestling ability. Razor Girl, that crazy chick was like wrestling a wild wolverine! The bottom line is that I’ve faced off against every challenger so far and I’ve beat them, and that’s not even counting the battle royal I won to take this belt in the first place. I’ve beaten real challengers, not has been’s- and never will be’s like Lil’ Whatsername beat. So, I’ll take my 3-0 over her sorry, diminished, 4-0 any day of the week sugar lips.
Dusty: You know what? That’s fine, bottom line is that the number one contender to that belt got busted up pretty bad last week and she’s taking this week off.
Steele: Aw, she got a boo-boo and needs to rest? One tournament and she needs a break? Amateur.
Dusty: You know, you would be wise to get acquainted with her.
Steele: Oh yeah, and why is that?
Dusty: Because she’s getting a title shot next week at the Resurrection PPV.
Steele leans back and chuckles
Steele: Are you joking? I mean, it’s on a Sunday night right? Isn’t that a school night? Will she even be able to stay up late enough to compete?
Dusty: Laugh all you want champ, but that woman went through four men, most bigger than you, to win that TV Title, and she did it getting the hell knocked out of her along the way and still managed to show up here tonight to address the fans.
Steele: Yeah yeah, fans shmans. Fair enough, you make sure her dad packs her a lunch next week and throws some animal crackers in there for me- I love me some animal crackers- and we’ll get down to the business of me beating her like a drum to add another win to my record.
He gets up to leave…
Dusty: Woah, where do you think you are going?
Steele: Well, first I’m going to get a bucket of ribs at Fat Hank’s Pork Emporium, then I’m heading back to my place to watch my recording of Dirty Dancing-it’s how I always prepare for PPV’s. Want to come over and I can show you how I suck the meat off a rib in one pass?
Dusty: Go get your tights on Steele, you’ve got a match tonight.
Dusty: That’s right, the fans pay to see champions wrestle and The TV and Tag Champs are both unable to put their belts up tonight.
Steele: But you said I was facing Happy Hong Kong next week! What gives!?!?
Dusty: You are, but tonight is a warm up. You’ve been goofing off in Minnesota for the last two weeks, consider this a chance to knock off some of that ring rust. It’s going to be non-title so you won’t drop that belt before facing the real number one contender.
Steele: FINE! You want me to dismantle some poor schmuck, the blood will be on your hands lady! So, who gets sacrificed tonight for your precious ratings?
Dusty: Tonight you will be facing Damien Genesis in a non-title match
Dusty: Damien Genesis. Used to go by the ring name King Cut.
Steele: You mean that Egyptian guy? The guy with that sweet little number that follows him around all half naked?
Dusty: Her name was Nyla and yes, that’s who I’m talking about.
Steele: Was? She’s not his valet anymore?
Dusty: No, they had a parting of ways and she went back to exotic dancing. She’s working down on ninth street now, some club called “The Glory Hole”.
Steele: HA! Get out of town! I leave this place for a few weeks and everything changes! Hell, I almost didn’t even find this dump! Told my driver to circle the building three times figuring it was some kind of parking garage! Course Corporal Punishments Caddy parked in the loading dock didn’t help any…
Dusty: Are you quite through? You’ve got a match later on tonight
Steele: Yeah, yeah, no worries Boss Lady, I’ll put on a good show for you and if I’m feeling generous, I might even leave enough of this Genesis character intact that he won’t need a Hover Round when I’m done with him.
CP: Damn right Sparks! But this will be a cakewalk for Steele! Genesis is a great grappler, but come on! This will be just another notch on Steele’s belt!
Sparks: Well, not really. It’s a non title match, if anything this is just a way for Steele to warm up before taking on Lil’ Tokyo at Resurrection.
CP: Still Sparks! I’ll put money down that Steele is going to show us tonight exactly why he is the OCW World Champion.
Sparks: Well, right now fans we’ve got our next match up! Mentalo, who put on such a wonderful showing last week in the TV Title Tournament is facing off against the head of Black Sun, Yojimbo!
CP: Yojimbo shook up the OCW last week Sparks! When he appeared with the Super Dragons and revealed this Crimson Mask chick, woah! He showed me something- that Black Sun is a force to be reckoned with, especially the way they brutalized the new TV Champ!
Sparks: Well, right now we’ll see Yojimbo in action, and he’s headed to the ring, and he’s got his new “enforcer” at his side, Crimson Mask!
Sparks: Mentalo is at ringside fans and he’s casting a wary glance at Crimson Mask! I don’t blame him! She’s obviously an “x-factor” fans! I’m sure having her at ringside is going to weigh heavy on his mind!
Mentalo finally makes it in the ring and we have the bell! Quick chops by Yojimbo and it sets Mentalo reeling! The luchadore rolls with them however and comes back with a standing dropkick! Yojimbo to the corner! Mentalo charges in and hits a huricanrana and goes for a quick pin! Two count!
Mentalo locks in a standing leglock and tries to get Yojimbo to submit but the wily vet makes to the ropes and Mentalo is forced to break the hold. Yojimbo hanging on the ropes to buy himself some time. Ok, back at it, spinning heel kick by Yojimbo takes down Mentalo! Yojimbo into the ropes, rebounds, hits a splash but Mentalo gets his knees up in time!
Yojimbo is hurting fans! Mentalo capitalizes with a flying elbow drop! Cover! Two count! Mentalo back up and hits a spinning heel kick of his own! Yojimbo is staggering! Scissors kick by Mentalo! Yojimbo goes down hard!
Mentalo goes to the corner! He’s going up! Looks like he’s going to flatten Yojimbo…WAIT! Crimson Mask just tripped him up! Mentalo is down on the mat!
Oh we knew it would be only a matter of time before Yojimbo’s “enforcer” got involved! Now, wait, whats this? LIL’ TOKYO HAS JUST COME OUT! She just leveled Crimson Mask with a sidekick! Crimson Mask is down and Lil’ Tokyo is on the ring apron! Yojimbo sees her and is screaming and Lil’ Tokyo comes off with a swanton dive and lands right on top of Crimson Mask! Oh fans Crimson Mawsk is doubled up in pain and Lil’ Tokyo is bailing out of the ringside area!
Yojimbo is furious fans! But wait! Mentalo is up, Yojimbo turns around- LOBOTOMIZER! Mentalo just nailed Yojimbo with that flaying dropkick and he covers! ONE…TWO…THREE! Mentalo pulls out a win and bails out of the ring! Lil’ Tokyo is gone fans! She disappeared almost as quickly as she appeared but Mentalo picks up the win!
Winner: Mentalo via pinfall @ 6:37
Sparks: What a match fans! Lil’ Tokyo certainly made her presence felt in that last match!
CP: She’s setting herself up for a world of pain Sparks! Black Sun isn’t a group to be messed with and while math wasn’t my favorite subject in school even I know that she’s outnumbered!
Sparks: She’s got the heart of a warrior CP!
CP: Yeah, and the body of a girl scout Sparks! That heart ain’t going to do her no good when Black Sun stomps a mudhole in her butt! Black Sun is going to go all Hiroshima on her!
Sparks: Oh CP….
CP: What? Too soon?
Sparks: Anyway, we’ve got Hass Machina in the ring and fans will remember last week in the tag team mini tournament they faced off and lost against the former OCW World Tag Champs The OG. Not a particularly impressive outing for a new team to be sure, but the OG are former champs, so…
CP: You know Sparks, besides the Tag Tournament they won those belts in, The OG never really did a damn thing! We talk about them like they have some kind of pedigree, but the truth is those two idiots dropped those titles to the Red Dragons in their first title defense!
Sparks: Well, the same could be said about The Super Dragons CP! It just goes to show the level of quality competitors in the OCW that titles move around so easily!
CP: Right, and it shows just how special someone like Brett Steele is!
Sparks: No argument here CP! Well tonight Hass Machina goes up against another new team to the OCW, straight from Puerto Rico- The Blue Unicorns!!!
CP: What? Are you serious?
Sparks: Of course, why?
CP: Blue Unicorns. From Puerto Rico.
Sparks: Well sure. I don’t know much about them of course, just that they are a young team that Dusty Diamond got in some sort of trade with a San Juan wrestling organization.
CP: A trade? What did we send them? Green Clovers? Purple Horseshoes?
Sparks: Funny, let’s go to the ring.
In the ring Maximilian of Hass Machina has a mic while the Blue Unicorns stand by waiting for the match to start…
Maximilian: We may have lost last week but that was a fluke, you American tag teams are soft and baby like! We will begin our devastation of this puny Puerto Rican team tonight. So bring it on you “pencil neck geeks” we are here, how do you say, to “chew some bubble gum and kick some ass and we are all out of bubble gum!!!!!”
With that Maximilian throws the mic down and Hass Machina attacks the Blue Unicorns!
Sparks: Oh my fans! Hass Machina is out to prove themselves tonight! They are brutalizing the Blue Unicorns and the ref has rung the bell!
Maximilian is hammering Blue Unicorn Dos! He’s got him up! Suplex! Dos is on the mat and out of it! He took the bulk of the pre-match attack and it looks like he’s simply out of step!
Tag in to Scorpio who slings Dos into the ropes and hits what he calls the “Noobslayer Lariat!”
Oh fans, he’s just toying with Blue Unicorn Dos now! He went for a pin but picked him up before the ref could even count! He’s setting him up…AND HITS A MODIFIED SHOULDERBREAKER! It’s his signature move, the USB Driver! He covers and it’s one..two..three fans! Hass Machina just walked in and took that win right from the Blue Unicorns tonight fans!
Winner: Hass Machina via pinfall @ 3:44
All members of Big Oil are in the interview area in the back of the OCW arena.
Big Daddy Ewing: Yes! Yes! Howdy ya’ll! Well Big Oil Proved last week with out a shadow of a doubt, that it will roll thru this company like a west Texas stampede, knocking everything down it its path, and leave everything its wake bare, bare I say, bare as in titles. The wheels are turning, and the all the cylinders are firing and soon the Hangmen will finish off the rest of the tag team division, and get the tag gold. And once we can get some suitable competition for The Outlaw, he'll be breathing down Brett Steels neck!
He passes the mic to Bobby Jack Casey
Bobby Jack: Thats right boss!! Guess Taz was just too yellow to face me in the ring, he tried to go outside, and tried to put his hands on you. Well he got what everybody else will get if they put their hands on Big Daddy, (He slams the cow bell on the bull rope on the floor and then picks it back up) they will get a taste of the bell! And what about that big dumb Russian? Hey big man I’m calling you out! Ya know, we both lost in the first round of that tourney last week, but I lost to some nutjob Aussie who had nothing to loose! You? Boy, you went and rolled over for your “friend” Primetime! And it was sweet! It was a reaaaaaal sweet gesture! I bet there is a lot of that sort of “give an’ take” between you two if you catch my drift! Well, lets see if you got what it takes, let’s see if you can stop the stampede tonight!!! TEXAS!!
The Executioner grabs the mic
The Executioner: What more do we have to prove? Hell! We beat Toxic Slop, and the Homeboys, who I do believe were the ex champs?? So me and the big man are throwin’ down the gauntlet! The Dragons are next, then the Hell Freaks! And we will show once and for all why we are the most destructive team in this sport!!! Tell em’ big man!!!
He slaps Noose on the chest
Noose: That’s right, We serve up destruction, and we dish out PAIN!!! No matter what you put in front of us, we will destroy it. I SMELL ANOTHER HANGIN!!!
Noose throws down the mic and Big Oil l walks off camera and we go to commercial.
Sparks: Well there you have it fans! Bobby Jack Casey throwing the gauntlet down to Sergei Khrushchev and the Big Russian has accepted! He’s already in the ring and here comes The Outlaw Bobby Jack Casey!
CP: Going to be a slugfest Sparks! Casey is a big ole’ Texan who likes to beat his opponents like disobedient cattle and Khrushchev is a big ole’ Russian Bear! These two going head to head will be a train wreck!
Sparks: Sergei isn’t wasting any time fans! He’s jumped Casey and both are exchanging closed fists! Casey wasn’t even able to get out of his duster and cowboy hat and Sergei has jammed it down on his head and sent him into the turnbuckle!
Big Daddy is trying to get out of the ring but Sergei has him by the coat and gives him a headbutt! Big Daddy goes down hard and rolls out of the ring! He’s like a big old weeble wobble out here at ringside and the fans love it!
Bobby Jack is back up and he’s hit Sergei in the back! The Russian has gone down and Bobby Jack is just stomping him with those big boots! Sergei is getting back on his feet! He blocks Bobby Jack’s right fist! Counter! He sends Casey into the ropes and lands a big boot! Casey goes down! Sergei drops a big elbow across Casey’s back! Casey is hurting fans! Sergei taking full advantage! He’s on Casey’s back and locks in a cobra clutch!
Casey isn’t giving up fans! He’s shaking his head! He’s trying to make his way to the ropes and Sergei breaks the hold and hammers Casey between the shoulderblades!
Sergei has Casey up and sends him into the ropes- reversal! Sergei comes off and right into a flying lariat!
Sergei is down! Casey with a kneedrop to Sergei’s forehead! Sergei sits up, grabbing his face! Casey with a sleeperhold! He’s got it cinched in! Sergei is fighting it! Casey looks like he’s choking out the big Russian- come on ref! You have to see that!
Your official tonight fans, a new addition to the OCW staff, Summer Rayne, seems to be calling this match right down the middle. Casey still working on that sleeper, Sergei getting a second wind, powering himself up, elbow to Casey’s midsection! Another! Casey breaks the hold! Sergei into the ropes and comes off with a shoulder block! Casey goes down! Sergei picks him up and locks in a bearhug! He’s squeezing Casey for all he’s worth! Sergei is trying to put this match away and it looks like he wants to hear Casey say the words “I quit!”
Wait! Big Daddy is up on the ring apron, distracting the ref! Sergei breaks the hold and charges the manager! Big Daddy dives for safety and is mouthing something at Sergei!
Hang on fans! Bobby Jack Casey is back up! He’s nailed Sergei and rolled him up for a pin! WAIT! He’s got his feet up on the middle ropes for leverage! The ref doesn’t see it! ONE…TWO…THREE!!!
What a miscarriage of justice fans! Casey flat out cheated to get this win!!! The ref didn’t see a thing and she’s raising Casey’s arm in victory and Sergei is stunned! Sergei is up complaining to the ref and Big Daddy has just tossed that cowbell in to Casey, HE’S NAILED SERGEI! Sergei is down and Casey is whipping him with that heavy thick cowbell! Oh my fans the big Russian is split open and Casey is throwing the crowd his Texas Longhorn Hand signal! What a criminal act and Sergei is still out of it!!!
Winner: The Outlaw Bobby Jack Casey via pinfall @ 11:43
We go to commercial! When we return Jackie Midnight is standing in the interview area with Kai, who is bandaged up and looking furious
Jackie Midnight: Hello Fans, I’m here with…
Kai grabs the mic from her hand!
Kai: The fans know who I am! You know, ever since I arrived in the OCW, I’ve been watching…waiting for someone that is worth my effort, and now I have a bone to pick…. (long pause)…
BLOOD RAGE! I know you are new here, and in a hurry to make known you are a “monster”. Well, I'm rather new here myself, only been active for 2 weeks but tonight you crossed the line. So, lets see who the bigger monster is. How about at Resurrection!?! I bring my bat, You bring your chair, and then you feel the heat of being molded into a real monster. I have felt the FLAMES! We shall have a clash of the titans IN HELL....IN AN INFERNO MATCH! So? How about it Blood Rage!?!
Jackie takes the mic back as both look at each other. A few moments pass in silence…
Jackie Midnight: I, I don’t think he’s going to answer you…
Kai: Of course. He can take victims but not a challenge. He’s no monster, just a chair swinging foo…
Suddenly, Blood Rage appears and nails Kai in the back with a chair! Jackie Midnight screams and clears out as Blood Rage continues to hammer Kai with the chair! Finally, after several chair shots, Blood Rage throws the chair aside and pulls a slip of paper from his vest and tosses it onto Kai’s prone body. He stares down at Kai for a moment and then turns and walks away A moment later Jackie steps back into the shot and reaches down, retrieving the slip of paper as EMT’s race in and begin to attend to Kai, but Kai’s having none of it. Surprisingly, he throws the EMT’s off and stands on shaky legs and grabs Jackie Midnight by the wrist…
Kai: What….what does it say….
Jackie unfolds the note with trembling fingers holds it up…
Jackie Midnight: It…it says “Challenge Accepted”
Kai slowly nods, and surprisingly gives a wicked smile before letting go of Midnight and limping off camera! We cut to commercial!!! We’re back with Sparks and CP at the play by play table
Sparks: OH MY GOD FANS! Did you see that CP? What brutality! Kai challenged Blood Rage to an Inferno Match at Resurrection and wanted an answer and he got it!
CP: He got it in spades Sparks! Like I said, that Blood Rage is like a force of nature! You don’t know where he is going to strike or what is going to be left when he’s gone! He doesn’t seem to care about titles or belts or mouthing off, he just wants to cause as much destruction and chaos as possible!
Sparks: Well where the hell was Los Security when Kai was getting beat down!?!
CP: Probably siesta time Sparks! Who cares? Can you blame them for not getting between these two freaking monsters!?! One goes around swinging a bat, another goes around swinging a chair! I’m telling you right now Sparks, and mark my words, this Inferno Match? It’s only the beginning between these two.
Sparks: Well we’ve got our OCW non-title match up next fans, as champion Brett Steele faces off against Damien Genesis.
CP: We’re going to see what the champ brings to the table when he’s wrestling cold Sparks! He’s had a two week layoff, coming back in and going up against Genesis without any notice, this will be a measure of his true caliber!
Sparks: Well, here comes Genesis fans! He’s looking like he’s ready for this opportunity! He’s flexing and jawing to some fans, but he’s got a smile on his face and he seems like he’s in a good mood, but he better be focusing on…wait, what’s this? He’s stopped at ringside and he’s talking to a fan, he looks exasperated, who is this woman and…wait…is that Nyla?
It is! Without the headdress and Egyptian getup I didn’t recognize her fans! What is she doing here at ringside? She’s mouthing something to Damien, she looks like she’s crying!
Genesis looks conflicted fans! He’s turning to get into the ring but Nyla grabs his arms! She’s pleading! Damien is just shaking his head! He looks like he’s shrugging, trying to ..OH MY GOD! Crippler Brett Steele just came out of nowhere and nailed Genesis!!!
He’s got Genesis up...SUPLEX ON THE CONCRETE! Oh my word!!!
Genesis is out fans! His head just rebounded off that floor like a basketball and he’s out cold! Steele is in the ring and telling the ref to count! The ref has no choice! He rings the bell and he’s counting! Fans there is no way Genesis will be able to …wait, what’s this? Genesis is actually making it to his feet!!! Steele is astounded! Damien Genesis is fighting his way up from the ground and the fans are cheering him on! He’s on his feet but the ref is up to eight…nine…Genesis makes it in!
Steele not wasting any time fans! He goes to land a fist and Genesis blocks it and reverses it into a neckbreaker!
Quick pin! ONE…TWO…Thr…kickout! The OCW World champ just barely kicked out of the surprise pin!
Steele with boots to Genesis! He’s measuring him, kneedrop to his neck! Steele is irritated that his scheme didn’t work fans and he’s making Genesis pay! The crowd has a Genesis chant going, trying to get him up and moving! Steele goes for a German suplex but Genesis blocks, lands a right, a left, sends Steele into the ropes and nails a flying dropkick!
Steele bounces off the mat and struggles to his feet! Genesis locks in a sleeper! He may take this match home fans! The ref is checking Steele! Steele is struggling! WAIT! Steele grabs the ref and trips him up! All three hit the mat!
Genesis breaks the hold but the ref is out! Genesis picks Steele back up...EYE GOUGE! Genesis is blinded! Steele slides out of the ring, grabs that OCW championship belt and slithers back in the ring! HE NAILS GENESIS! Damien Genesis goes down!
Steele kicks the ref awake and locks in the Punjab Lasso on Genesis! The ref is groggy but he sees it! He checks Genesis but what is the use? Genesis is out of it and the ref calls for the bell!
Winner: Crippler Brett Steele via submission @ 7:14
Sparks: What cheap tactics fans! Steele wasn’t even defending that title tonight! Still he used cheap tactics just to take home that win! And what about Nyla showing up at ringside!?! How did she even know Genesis was competing tonight? Was this all a set up by the OCW World Champ?
Alright fans, from one champ to another, Jackie Midnight is in the back right now with the TV Champ, Lil’ Tokyo! Jackie, take it away!
Jackie Midnight: Thanks Scooter! Come on in here champ…
Lil’ Tokyo enters wearing a pantsuit, her hair is up in an oriental bun and she’s got her belt thrown over her shoulder. She bows to Jackie who returns the gesture.
Lil’ Tokyo: I am honored to meet you Jackie-san. I am a fan. I watched you wrestle as a girl when you toured Japan.
Jackie Midnight: Wow girl, Japan? That was, uh, well, that really wasn’t that long ago and you’re still very young. Anyways, first off congratulations on your victory last week . You had to fight through some very tough competition to take home that belt, and in the last match you faced off against a man who offered his help, Roland Hard, and Roland, well he didn’t look very happy to have lost to you a second week in a row.
Lil’ Tokyo: Thank you Jackie-san. Yes, you are correct. I had planned on asking Roland Hard to partner with me against the Super Dragons before the unexpected tournament last week, but , as you pointed out, after beating him again in the ring so soon, he did not seem pleased, and I suspect that a formal alliance may not come to pass. I harbor no hard feelings toward him.
Jackie Midnight: Well, I guess time will tell if the feeling is mutual. But lets move on to the events following that title match! You were brutalized by Black Sun, an organization established by a man you once trusted and even partnered with, Yojimbo! That has to carry more than just physical pain.
Lil’ Tokyo: Yes, Yojimbo’s betrayal is hurtful beyond words. His dishonor knows no bounds! I believed his false words of friendship and then he attacks me directly! Then he hires this Crimson Mask woman who beats me with my own newly won belt!! My shame is great Jackie-san! Black Sun shall pay for their heinous treachery! Even if I have to do it alone!
From off camera, Mentalo steps into the shot. Jackie turns and holds her hand up
Jackie Midnight: Woah there! Jackie Midnight is in the middle of an interview, I’ll sign your autograph when, oh, it’s you Mentalo, uhm, what do you want?
Mentalo: Lil’ Tokyo, mi amiga, I would like say muchos gracias for your help during my match tonight. As you know, it is not the first time that I have had problems with the more…shall we say…dishonorable elements in this federation. I witnessed the attack on yourself just last week by the same people who attacked me tonight. I have always admired your sense of honor and I would like to offer formal alliance between us. I would be honored to “watch your back” as they say, and in return you watch mine.
Lil’ Tokyo: You have honor Mentalo-san. And it would please me greatly to call you my friend. Yes, I would be honored to be your ally against the many dishonorable fighters in this federation.
They shake hands, when suddenly, The OCW World Champ Crippler Brett Steele appears and grabs Mentalo by the back of his head and shoves him out of the shot!!!
Steele: GO ON! GET OUT OF HERE YOU CURTAIN JERKER!
Lil’ Tokyo: Steele! What are you….
Steele: Hey! You shut it Tiny Singapore! I’m just putting you on notice! You better bring your “A” game girlie, because if you think I’m going to go easy on you next week at our match at Resurrection you’re going to wake up with that cheap plastic title wrapped around your throat! You think what those Asians did to you last week was bad? That’s nothing compared to what I’m going to put you through at our match!
Lil’ Tokyo: Steele-San, first I must tell you, I like your sunglasses, but I am wondering, where are the rest of “The Breakfast Club?”
Steele: What!?! You’re cracking jokes little girl? Let me tell you about these sunglasses, they’re called Ray-Bans and they’re classics, just like the man wearing them! But you better worry less about my eyewear and more about the beating I’m going to put on you next week. I hope you like that Toys R’ Us belt you got over your shoulder, cause it’s the only one you’ll be leaving Resurrection with!
Lil’ Tokyo: Steele-san, you seem a capable fighter when defending your title, but the way you won that title, through tricks and loopholes in the rules, is without honor, and that stunt you pulled tonight against Damien Genesis only illustrates my point further. I shall win the world title honorably next week. And if you want it back? You shall have to fight for it-honestly!
Jackie Midnight: Well fans! I guess we’ve got something to look forward to at Resurrection! Back to you Scooter!!!
Sparks: Strong words between the two combatants in next weeks world title matchup CP!
Sparks: But she got heart…
CP: Oh stop it with the Karate Kid crap Sparks! Ain’t no Mr. Miagi to instruct her! Ain’t going to be no miracle on ice for this little chick! All she’s got is luck and a crazy luchadore on her side and I’m telling you right now that simply ain’t enough! Steele is going to make short work of her at Resurrection and keep that ten pounds of gold around his waist.
Sparks: Well, lets just agree to disagree, shall we?
CP: Better yet, lets just agree you’re wrong and I’m right.
Sparks: Anyway! Next up fans we’ve got a tag battle that will pit the number one and number two contenders to the world tag belts, The former champs the Super Dragons and The Hangmen! CP, any predictions on the outcome of this match?
CP: Going to be a hard one to call Sparks! The Super Dragons are a tough team, despite losing those belts in their first defense, they spent a lot of time in Japan and defended the titles against some really solid teams! And The Hangmen, well what needs to be said? Those hombre’s are tough as Teflon underwear!
Sparks: Well we’ve got both teams in the ring fans and it looks like we’ve got a match!
Sparks: No fooling around with either of these teams fans! The Dragons look ready for business and The Hangmen look like their first customers!
The Executioner and Red Dragon to start out and the wily veteran lands a series of hip tosses on the rapidly advancing Dragon! He’s flustered and The Executioner finally grounds him with a elbow drop and has locked in a figure four! Silver Dragon in for the save however and the ref warns him but The Executioner wastes no time in blocking Red Dragon in the Hangmen’s corner where Noose holds the younger grappler while The Executioner hammers him with fists! The ref warning The Executioner, and while his back is turned Noose uses the tag rope to choke the Dragon out! Welcome to Dirty Tactics fans! Occupation Noose and The Executioner! These tag team vets are successful for a reason fans! They are able to get away with just enough to give themselves that edge teams need to make it to the top!
Executioner back in the center of the ring and he’s locking in a full nelson! Red Dragon is fighting it! Heel kick to Executioner’s groin! Well that’s one way to break a hold fans! Executioner goes down hard and it opens it up for Red Dragon to tag in Silver Dragon!
The vet comes in and measures Executioner who’s still on his knees! Sidekick to the throat!
Executioner is down fans and Silver Dragon covers for a pin but only gets a two count! He’s up, he’s going to the ropes, but Noose lands a knee in his back and Silver Dragon goes down hard! Executioner manages to get over and get a tag and in comes Noose!
Noose wasting no time and he picks Silver Dragon up and begins pressing him like a barbell! What strength fans! Just one look at, WAIT! Red Dragon just went up top and came off with a flying dropkick right between Noose’s shoulders! He’s collapsed and Silver Dragon landed right on top of him! Cover! ONE...TWO...breakup by Executioner! All four men in the ring now and we’ve got a donnybrook! The ref is trying to get it all sorted out! Alright, we’ve finally got some order fans! On the outside Big Daddy Ewing is jawing with Yojimbo, who directs Crimson Mask over towards the Hangmen’s manger and Big Daddy hightails it around the corner of the ring! I bet the last time he moved that fast was when he found out they were serving Krispy Kreme Cheeseburgers at the State Fair!
Alright, back in the ring Executioner and Silver Dragon locking up, the two ring vets feeling each other out, just an armbar by Executioner, reversed, kick to the abdomen by Silver Dragon, Executioner down on one knee, Silver Dragon ties Executioner up into a cradle, gets a two count. Executioner with a closed fist, takes down Silver Dragon, he tags in Noose, they sling Silver Dragon into the ropes and hit a double flying shoulderblock! Cover by Noose, two count thanks to interference from Red Dragon! Noose is up and Executioner has come in, they’re both pounding on Red Dragon, uh oh! They’ve got him up fans! It looks like it’s “Hang Em’ High” time! WAIT! Silver Dragon just spit that green mist into Noose’s eyes! He’s stumbling around the ring and the ref didn’t see it!
Executioner tackles Silver Dragon and both roll outside! Red Dragon follows and Noose is out on the ground being wailed on by Crimson Mask! She just kicked him in the throat! He’s down fans! The ref is counting! All four men out of the ring! EIGHT…NINE…TEN! DOUBLE COUNTOUT! The Super Dragons are bailing out of the ringside area and Big Daddy and Executioner are tending to the fallen Noose! What a brutal display fans! We thought we were going to get legitimate number one contenders out of this match but I guess The Hangmen take the spot simply by their won-lost record! Looks like 2-1 is good enough to get them a title shot against the Hellcats!
Winner: Double Countout @ 10:40
We cut to a grainy green tinted camera feed, that could possibly be infrared. For a moment we don’t see anything, then a moment later we see a door with a placard and the words “Army of Darkness- DO NOT ENTER” printed in bold letters. A gloved hand puts a lockpick gun into the lock and pulls it back a moment later. Slowly, the gloved hands opens the door just a crack and we can see Crypt from Toxic Shock sitting on a folding chair and hear a booming voice from within…
Voice: I WANT PAIN! TONIGHT I WANT YOU TO TAKE THE SPAWN OF PUNISHMENT’S LOINS AND REDUCE HER TO HER BASE ELEMENTS! I WANT HER TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS WHEN SOME LESSER FORM CHALLENGES THE ARMY OF DARKNESS! I WANT..
The gloved hand reappears with a canister marked “tear gas” that’s placed between the door and door jamb, it’s nozzle pointing into the room. A moment later the hand reappears with a small round black ball. The thumb pulls free the pin and the orb is rolled into the room. The hand reaches down and also frees the pin on the tear gas canister which begins to smoke. Crypt looks down as the ball rolls and finally comes to rest against his boot.
Crypt: Oooooooo Baaaaaaaaallllll…….
Booming Voice: ..I…What? NO DON’T TOUCH THAT!
A Flash of light and a pop! Fills the screen and everything goes white!!! Screams can be heard from inside the room and we go to commercial!!!
We return to the announcers table
CP: HA HA HA!!!!!
Sparks: CP, what the heck was that?
CP: That? That looked like black ops to me Sparks! I bet the Hellcats and Mr.Lucifer are gonna need a change of drawers after that!
Sparks: You know, this is only going to get them riled up! Your daughter already dug herself a hole when she challenged them! This little stunt is going to land her in a bodybag!
CP: Oh calm down Scooter, it’s called a preemptive strike! Hit them before they have a chance to hit you! Weaken their defenses! Catch them off guard and keep them guessing! You know, I don’t usually give the Asians credit for creating much more than crazy-ass kiddie porn cartoons and cool gameshows, but I’ll tell you, that old Sun Tzu, you can learn a lot from him. Little P as I call her, she devoured “The Art of War”, even did a paper on it in college, so if there is one young woman you do not want to engage in head games with, its her! Trust me! I tried when she wanted to go to the prom in an Urban Camo dress instead of a forest pattern and she messed with my head for a week! Finally wound up chop-blocking the mailman and wounding the neighbors Poodle before I gave in!
Sparks sits stunned, mouth agape.
CP: What’s wrong with you Sparks? Did one of these Portland Ring Rats flash you and you finally saw a real pair? You okay?
Sparks: Uhm, yeah, sure I guess. Anyway, Uh, we still have some wrestling to get to and right now we’ve got a match that looks to put a nail in the coffin of the Allies-Horsemen feud! Fans will remember that back and forth between those two factions that dominated the OCW just a few weeks back. Well it ended with that brutal Tower of Revenge match, or so we thought!
Turns out it wasn’t over for the Allies, who wanted one last measure of revenge against former Horseman, Buck Leeds.
Last week Primetime Murphy and Sergei Khrushchev battled in the first round of the TV Title Tournament with the winner earning the right to face off against Buck Leeds and this is the match we’ve got up next! Primetime Murphy versus Buck Leeds!
CP: Yeah, well I’m hoping this puts an end to it Sparks! In my opinion Murphy is wasting his time with Leeds when he should be pursuing a title! Leeds has ability but he’s doing nothing with it! He needs direction! Focus! He tried to ride that Horseman train and it just left the station without him!
Sparks: Alright fans, Primetime Murphy is making his way to the ring and he looks pumped for this match! He’s in the ring and still sporting that protective mask adorned with the logo of his alma mater, the University of Miami he is forced to wear after his Tower of Revenge match! Don’t worry fans, he’s got a doctors note, it’s totally legit!
Ok, and here comes Leeds…oh now what’s this? Leeds is also wearing a protective mask fans! This one has something written on it….”Your Ad Here”, oh that’s rich!
He’s just pushing Primetime’s buttons fans! He knows how much Primetime holds his college affiliation close to heart and he’s just trying to get under his skin!
Both are jawing back and forth and the ref calls for the bell and the match is on! Leeds holding his hand up and removing that mask- and throws it at Primetime! It explodes in a cloud of dust and Primetime is blinded! Leeds jumping Primetime and hammering away! That mask must have been made of packed salt or something fans! It just disintegrated when Leeds smacked it against Murphy’s face!
Leeds getting Murphy up, DDT! Looks like Leeds is trying to end this quick! Cover! Two count and Primetime gets a shoulder up! Leeds picks up Primetime who looks like he’s still blind and sends him into the ropes, clothesline! Primetime is stunned and Leeds is mocking him! This is sickening to watch fans! Leeds is making faces at Primetime and Murphy has no idea! Swinging neckbreaker on Primetime! Now Leeds is just hammering away at Primetime! He’s jerked off that protective mask! Oh fans, Murphy’s in trouble and his face looks terrible! We knew he had to have some reconstructive surgery after his Tower of Revenge match but it’s safe to say he will never look exactly the same again! Leeds with a kneelift and Primetime goes down! Leeds is slowly climbing to the top rope, taking his time, measuring Murphy who is on his feet and stumbling around the ring, DIVING CLOTHESLINE! Primetime is down and again, Leeds is just having his way with him! He has no intention of covering Primetime fans, Leeds just wants to humiliate him and make him pay! Wait, Sergei Khruschev has run down to the ring! The ref is warning him not to interfere! Sergei is up on the ring, he’s got something in his hand, a glass, he just threw a glass of water right into Primetime’s face! Primetime’s drenched fans but it looks like that did the trick! It looks like it woke him up and he can finally see! He’s rubbing his eyes while Leeds hipchecks Sergei and the big Russian gets knocked off the ring apron! He turns around to deal with Primetime- HEADLINER! Primetime just hit his finisher, that vicious brainbuster and Leeds is out cold! Cover by Murphy! ONE…TWO…THREE! Primetime Murphy takes the win!
Wait, now he’s inviting Sergei in the ring, the big Russian accepts, uh oh, looks like they have plans for Leeds. Sergei has Leeds up, he’s got him in a bearhug! He’s squeezing Leeds for all he’s worth! Leeds is screaming like a schoolgirl! Uh oh! Sergei is dipping down, Primetime into the ropes- CLOTHESLINE ON LEEDS! Leeds just flipped end over end and hit the mat! A few boots to his back by the Allies and that’s all she wrote! Looks like there isn’t a darn thing wrong between these two partners fans!
Winner: Primetime Murphy via pinfall @ 6:23
Back in Dusty’s office, Roland Hard is leaning on her desk…
<>BR> Roland: Well? Did you just see what happened out there? Primetime won his damn match!
Dusty: I’m not surprised and neither should you be. He’s a solid competitor.
Roland: Yeah, I got that lady, my point is, and the reason I’m here, is cause with his victory tonight, and that luchadore’s we all just earned ourselves 3-1 records, dig?
Dusty: Uhm, no, I don’t “dig”.
Roland: You gonna make me spell it out for you woman? We all tied for the number one contenders spot for that TV Title! Now, I know Tokyo got herself a world title match at Resurrection, and if she lose? That’s cool, and if she win? That’s cool too, but I wanna know just how you gonna handle this deal, cause up until tonight I was the sole # 1 contender for that TV belt, now I got two jokers sitting shoulder to shoulder with me and I don’t like it, not one bit.
Dusty: Oh, you don’t like it huh?
Roland: Nope, not one, single, tiny, little bit.
Dusty: Huh. Well tell you what Roland. You’re right, since we’ve gone to a won-lost ranking system this week, I guess we’ll need to figure out who the true #1 contender to that belt is going to be. So here’s what we’re going to do. At Resurrection, you, Primetime Murphy and Mentalo are going to face off in a Triple Threat Elimination match…
Roland: Aw hell, here we go, anutha triple threat match…
Dusty: Let me finish! The winner will be the last one standing. Now, if Lil’ Tokyo loses to Steele in the main event, whoever wins the Triple Threat match goes on to face her for that TV Title at the next Monday Night Meltdown! But…
Dusty: But...if she wins that title then you know what that means?
Roland: Yeah, title gonna be vacant. You gonna have another jive-ass tournament to decide the champ?
Dusty: Uh-uh. Tournaments are fine every now and then but we risk injury and folks get busted up way too bad. No, if she wins that world title guess whose record becomes 4-1?
Roland: Ah, I see….Steele. Brett Steele.
Dusty: Right you are my rotund friend. His record becomes 4-1, the same as the winner of the Triple Threat Elimination Match between you, Primetime and Mentalo. So, if Steele looses his belt, then on the next Monday Night Meltdown he gets to fight the winner of your Triple Threat match for that TV Title.
Roland: So wait, Steele gets his ass beat and loses his belt and the next night he gets a shot at another belt? That don’t seem fair!
Dusty: That’s the way the system works now buddy. Wins and losses and not much more in between, understand? You don’t like it? Then get your ass active and win that triple threat match and then go and get your damn TV Title, but one thing I don’t want to see is a bunch of pissing and moaning. Especially since Lil’ Tokyo handed you your ass not one but TWO weeks in a row.
Roland: That deal there was bogus yo! Did you see that little girl move? It was like trying to keep up with my six kids! She get all over you and, and, man you got no idea!
Dusty: Yeah, it sounds rough. Anyway, that’s the way it is. Dig?
Roland: A’ight. Fair enough. Well then, I guess, you know, I be leaving.
Dusty: Do that. And don’t bother closing the door on your way out, there isn’t one.
We got to commercial! When we return Major Punishment is in the back on her way to the ring. Jackie Midnight runs up and tries to keep stride with her…
Jackie Midnight: Major! Major was that you who lobbed that flash grenade into the Army of Darkness locker room earlier?
Major Punishment: You’re smart Midnight, figure it out!
Jackie Midnight: Well, do you think that is going to have an effect on your match tonight with Barb Wire? Perhaps rile the Hellcats up more than usual?
Major Punishment: Midnight, the Hellcats went to damn far last week putting their hands on my daddy! Well tonight I might not get them all, but I’m going to do my damndest to get me some payback! Payback’s a bitch and her name is MAJOR PUNISHMENT!
Back at ringside, Mr. Lucifer is on his way to the ring with the Hellcats in the “Devils Toybox” a large gothic metal cage on wheels that Mr. Lucifer pulls to the ring by a thick rusty chain. They’re wild as usual, hissing at the fans and trying to escape. Crypt and Creeper follow behind at a respectful distance, stumbling somewhat, their pale bodies marked with black marks and their eyes watering uncontrollably as they dab at them with bar towels. Once to the ring, Mr. Lucifer opens the Toybox and reaches in, grabbing the Hellcats’ chains as they exit and climb through the ropes growling and hissing at the crowd. Toxic Shock are pacing about, doing their best to stay away from the Hellcats. Mr. Lucifer grabs the mic…
Mr.Lucifer: Last week, Corporal Punishment thought he could conduct an interview with me unbidden. I was gracious enough to give him a few words despite his lack of permission to approach me. He was not satisfied with what I gave him and unwisely decided to press me for details. He should have obeyed my dismissal…
Mr. Lucifer snaps his fingers and the Hellcats’ are instantly obedient and kneel to either side of him. Crypt and Creeper take up positions behind him, still wiping their eyes with towels...
Mr.Lucifer: I am accustomed to obedience. So Corporal Punishment was dealt with appropriately. But, it seems daddy’s little girl has a problem with how I handled her aging father. Earlier tonight this foolish child threw tear gas into our locker room in an attempt to alter tonight’s outcome and perhaps give herself an edge in her match against Barb. My dear, when you face the Army of Darkness, you best come prepared to throw more than trinkets and party favors at us. All your little act did was extend the torture you’ll experience in this ring tonight. You want a taste of Hell? Then come to the ring and we shall fulfill your desire for destruction…
Sparks: Well this is it CP! Daddy’s little girl is going to go toe to toe with Barb Wire of the Hellcats! I know it’s pointless to ask you how you think she’ll do, but that’s my job. Any predictions?
CP: Don’t be daft Sparks! That’s my little girl in there! She’s been living and breathing wrestling since she was knee high to a grasshopper! She’s going to do just what her old man used to do! Go right in there and take care of business! As long as this is a fair fight, Barb Wire has a chance, the second it becomes something else, then start worrying about the Hellcat!
Sparks: Alright fans! You heard it from the man himself! And here comes Major Punishment! Mr.Lucifer backs Barb into a corner and waits. The Major is in the ring and the ref calls for the bell, Mr.Lucifer and the rest of the Army of Darkness leave the ring and here comes Barb!!!
CP: You don’t mind if I chime in here do you Sparks? I know you usually handle play by play but that’s my little girl in there and I want to make sure she gets a fair shake on your side of things!
Sparks: Uh, sure CP. Well, Barb just charged into a snap mare by the Major who’s got a headlock cinched in tight! Looks like her old man taught her well!
CP: Damn right Scooter! That right there is textbook! No matter how wild and crazy you are, you lock in a perfect headlock and that will suck the starch right outta your shorts!
Sparks: Barb powering to her feet, elbows to the Majors midsection! Barb into the ropes and nails Major with a shoulder block! Barb’s not done yet though, she’s got a headlock of her own and she’s licking the side of the Major’s face with that wicked forked tongue!
CP: Aw, Little P hates that! That crazy Hellcat is just adding fuel to the fire! And now she’s hammering on her with those closed fists! Bad move you crazy ass!
Sparks: And Major Punishment is taking just that right now! Some Major Punishment! Barb into the ropes and comes off with a legdrop! Oh! And those spiked boots went right into the throat of Major Punishment! She’s grabbing her throat! That had to hurt CP!
CP: She’s tough Sparks! She went through worse than this in boot camp!
Sparks: Barb has her up by her hair and throws her over the top rope! Maybe Major Punishment bit off more than she can chew! Barb follows her out and rams her into the steel stairs! Major Punishment rammed hard! She’s on the mat and Barb has her back up, wait! Barb has a chair! Major is a sitting duck, propped up against that ring post! Here comes Barb! She missed!!! Major Punishment was playing possum and has taken that chair away from barb and nails her with it!
CP: Told ya Sparks! Just when you think you got her figured out she mixes it up on ya!
Sparks: I guess so CP! Barb is down on the ground and it looks like the Army of Darkness is surrounding her on both sides…not making a move, just watching and waiting!
CP: And as long as they stay there we wont have a problem Sparks! Looks like Little P has tossed Barb back in the ring where the fight belongs! She goes up top, Barb is stumbling around, Flying clothesline! Barb goes down hard and we’ve got a pin! ONE..TWO…Kickout! Not surprised Sparks, that Barb is one tough cookie!
Sparks: True CP! Major has her back up and picks her up…ATOMIC DROP! Oh, Barb felt that one fans! Wait! Razor Girl is up on the ring apron and the Major just nailed her! Razor Girl falls to the outside and has gone berserk! Mr.Lucifer is holding her back but she wants in that ring bad!
Uh oh, that gave Barb just enough of a break to regroup, Major just turned around and walked right into a kick to the gut! Now Barb has her up for a bodyslam…no! Airplane spin into a facebuster! She rolls Major P up for a pin! One…TWO…Kickout! She almost had daddy’s little girl beat there fans!
CP: Just simmer down there Sparky! It’s going to take more than a facebuster to take out my girl! Hell, I used to give those to her whenever she didn’t get her homework done by supper!
Sparks: Wow, the things you used to be able to get away with back in the eighties! Alright, Barb still on the attack! She hooks Majors legs under her arms, slingshot catapult right into the turnbuckle! Major P just went face first into the turnbuckle and now she’s just lying in the corner like a sack of whipped soldier! Barb is on her knees wagging that tongue at the camera! She has to be happy with how this match is going!
CP: It ain’t over yet Scooter, just you see!
Sparks: Alright fans! Barb stalking back in the corner, she grabs Major P by her hair, Wait! Major just landed an elbow to Barb’s throat! Again! She’s got her second wind! She’s climbed up on the second rope and comes off with an elbow drop to the top of Barb’s head! Oooh! Not a good move for Major P who split her arm open on those spikes sprouting out of Barb’s head! But she doesn’t seem phased fans! I’m sure she’s no stranger to blood! Barb is stunned! Major P thrusts her head down and between her legs…underhook powerbomb!!!
CP: YEAH! That’s what I’m talking about Sparks!
Sparks: Alright CP, just clam down. Looks like Major Punishment isn’t going for a pin though, she’s getting Barb up…what…
CP: BLACK OPS BACKBREAKER! This is her finisher Sparks! Barb is DONE!
Sparks: The Corporal is right fans! Barb is draped across Major’s shoulders and Major P is stretching her for all she’s worth! This looks to be over…OH HERE WE GO! Here comes the Army of Darkness!!! Well we know how this one ends!
Winner: Major Punishment via DQ @ 8:20
CP: OH HELL NO! NOT AGAIN!
Sparks: Fans Razor Girl just nailed Major Punishment in the back and shes down! Now Toxic Shock and Razor Girl are stomping Major Punishment with those boots! Razor Girl has her arms locked behind her back and shes making her kneel! Here comes Mr. Lucifer, whats he doing? RAZOR GIRL IS MAKING MAJOR PUNISHMENT KISS MR. LUCIFERS SHOES! HE’S LAUGHING AND RAZOR GIRL IS JUST SMASHING HER LIPS ONTO THOSE SIZE 14’s!!! Oh fans, Wait! Here comes Corporal Punishment! He’s armed with a chair!
He hits the ring and smacks Crypt across the face! Crypt goes down! Creeper tries to grab the chair but CP lands a kick to the groin and nails Creeper! Mr.Lucifer has bailed out of the ring and Razor Girl has done likewise, helping her partner Barb Wire out as well!
CP is checking on his little girl! She took a solid beating before CP was able to get to the ring fans! She’s busted open, and CP is helping her to her feet, still keeping that chair at the ready! Toxic Shock has rolled out of the ring and has joined the rest of the Army of Darkness in the aisle! Wait! CP has a mic!!!
Corporal Punishment: Hey! Lucifer! You know, your Hellbitches are real bold, ganging up on people, taking your cheap shots! That’s all well and good when good wrestlers try to keep things above boards!
Well, you made the one mistake that I’m going to make damn sure you regret! You and your thugs put your hands on MY little girl! Instead of letting your Barb Wire fight her own battle and win or lose on her own ability, you decided you needed to get involved, and son, that’s going to be the first and LAST mistake you make!
So, you want to break rules? You want anything goes? Then how about your Hellcats step into OUR arena!?! How about you step into OUR world for once and see what happens?
Mr.Lucifer grabs a mic!
Mr. Lucifer: You aren’t even contenders! There is no way in my hell or any other that you’ll get a title shot!
Corporal Punishment: I’m not interested in titles son! I won more than my share and my little girl has plenty of time to win her own! No! What we want is real simple! WE WANT TO BEAT YOUR ASSES!
Mr.Lucifer: The only thing punishing about you is your mic skills! You want a non-title match? We can accommodate you!
Corporal Punishment: Oh no! Not just non-title buddy! I told you, we want you in OUR world! No rules, no DQ, just revenge!!!
Mr.Lucifer: I see! And just what to you propose Father Punishment?
Corporal Punishment: Simple! Next week at Resurrection, I come out of retirement, one night only! And me and my little girl take on your Hellcats- IN A BOOT CAMP MATCH!
The crowd roars with approval! Finally, Mr.Lucifer looks to the Hellcats and back to CP…
Mr.Lucifer: Then I guess we’ll see you next week at Resurrection, oh, and make sure you bring your Medicare benefit cards with you old man, because Memorial Hospital doesn’t take food stamps!
He throws down the mic and the Army of Darkness retreats as Corporal Punishment tends to his daughter in the ring
Sparks: MY WORD FANS! Looks like this situation gets resolved one way or the other next week! We’ve got to go fans! We’ll see you all at Resurrection!!!
The screen fades to black!!!